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Dan Vollmayer
Dan Vollmayer


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Biography
DV aka V Money has been performing stand up throughout new york, new jersey, and pennsylvania for the past three years, and is currently a contracted freelance writer for the late show with david letterman. dan has recently been cast to appear in the critically acclaimed sketch comedy show tara's comedy cosmos'

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240 Jokes  

Dan Vollmayer
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KFC To Stop Cooking Chicken With Trans Fat

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Mar 3, 2008
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

KFC

32 Jokes

KFC has announced they will no longer fry their chicken with trans fat cooking oil.

KFC says they’re making the move because their rats are putting on way too much weight.

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Passenger Detained After Urinating in Air Sick Bag

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Mar 3, 2008
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

R. Kelly

17 Jokes

Passenger Detained After Urinating in Air Sick BagEarlier today a passenger on a Cointental Airlines flight was detained for several hours after urinating in an air sick bag, but was later released after telling police he did it because there was simply ‘nowhere else to go.’

After hearing the news, R&B singer R. Kelly asked, “Why didn’t I use that excuse?”

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Rainforest Helps Fuel Airline Flight

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 29, 2008
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Airport

444 Jokes  17 Videos

Rainforest Helps Fuel Airline FlightNuts picked from the Amazon Rainforest helped fuel an airline flight from London to Amsterdam. It was the world’s first commercial airline fueled by nuts.

Also fueled by a bunch of nuts – the Bush Administration.

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Cellphone Companies Eliminating Analog Systems

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 29, 2008
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Cell Phone

209 Jokes  14 Videos

Cellphone Companies Eliminating Analog SystemsThis Monday the major cellphone companies announced they will shut down their analog systems, making older cellphones obsolete.

It's all apart of the cellphone companies’ master plan to once and for all rid the planet of all Zack Morris references.

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New Dollar Coin Enters Circulation

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 29, 2008
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Stripper

99 Jokes  1 Videos

New Dollar Coin Enters CirculationIt’s been announced that a new dollar coin featuring George Washington will enter circulation this week.

The US Mint hopes the dollar coin will one day be more popular than the dollar bill, saying coins are much more durable, and way more fun to throw at strippers.

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NEW YORK TOY FAIR

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 22, 2008
Category: Weird  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

New York

1179 Jokes  34 Videos

NEW YORK TOY FAIRThe highlight of the American International Toy Fair has been the Beanie Baby 2.0. What the toy is, is a regular beanie baby with a special computer chip that allows it to use access codes to hook the toy up online to chat, play games, and communicate with other beanie babies.

But the best Beanie Baby 2.0 access code is the code that punches the adult in the face who bought the Beanie Baby 2.0.

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MAYOR IN BRAZIL GIVES OUT FREE VIAGRA

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 22, 2008
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Viagra

79 Jokes  4 Videos

MAYOR IN BRAZIL GIVES OUT FREE VIAGRAIt’s being reported that a Brazilian mayor has been distributing free Viagra around his village to prevent infidelity.

The Brazilian press was shocked -- not that a mayor was distributing free Viagra, but shocked that Bob Dole is a Brazilian mayor.

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NBA SLAM DUNK CONTEST

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 22, 2008
Category: Sports  
From Hot Topic

New York Knicks

163 Jokes

NBA SLAM DUNK CONTESTLast weekend was the NBA All Star Weekend, and Saturday night was the big slam dunk contest. The highlight of the night was when this fella put a cupcake with a lit candle on top of the rim, and then dunked the ball and blew out the candle at the same time.

There was a guy there on the Knicks who wasn’t impressed. He said, “Yeah, well try blowing every night!”

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VALENTINE'S DAY IN NYC

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 14, 2008
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Valentine's Day

33 Jokes  2 Videos

VALENTINE'S DAY IN NYCYou know it’s Valentine’s Day in New York, when the city bums are asking for change next to a heart shaped stream of urine.

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CUPID REPLACED

By: Dan Vollmayer (C)
Submitted: Feb 14, 2008
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Valentine's Day

33 Jokes  2 Videos

CUPID REPLACEDThings were a little different this Valentine’s Day.

I heard Cupid and his bow and arrow were replaced by Dick Cheney and his shotgun.

A lot of Jewish lawyers falling in love today.

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