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Ernie Mccracken
Ernie Mccracken
"Warning: Not actual comedian. Side effects may include nausea, dry-mouth and cricket noises in background."



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53 Jokes  

Ernie Mccracken
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Legal Advice Needed...

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: May 31, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!

Legal Advice Needed...Would it be insurance fraud to take a big policy out on your car and then get this bumper sticker?

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Ernie Mccracken
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Nuculer Balm

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: May 28, 2007
Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

Nuculer BalmSimple Product:
When applied to the lips,
it just makes you mispronounce
really important words.

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DC Madam

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: May 22, 2007
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Bill Clinton

265 Jokes  8 Videos

DC MadamThe D.C. Madam announced her support for Hillary Clinton's run for President.

She noted "The Clintons have been such good customers over the years, that she really had no choice."

And added that "She has a lot of employees that look forward to working in the White House again."

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Fair and Balanced

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: May 8, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Fox News

62 Jokes  5 Videos

Fair and BalancedIn the interest of efficiency, Fox News will no longer have two guests debate both sides of an issue.

From now on, they will simply display both sets of talking points side-by-side on the screen.

But to help devoted FNC fans transition to this new format, they will simultaneously have a video of two monkeys competitively throwing feces at the other.

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Ego Blow

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: May 3, 2007
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Kate Moss

11 Jokes

Ego BlowPresident Bush was notably left off
TIME magazine’s “100 Most Influential” list.

Kate Moss, however, was included and praised for overcoming her bout with cocaine.


W: “Wait a damn minute.”

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Healthy Balance

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: Apr 15, 2007
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Dirty Mouth

2100 Jokes  60 Videos

Healthy BalanceI believe that East and West can find a healthy balance somewhere between women not being able to show their face and 16-year-olds walking around with the word JUICY printed on their ass.

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Ernie Mccracken
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Winged 'em

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: Apr 13, 2007
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Dick Cheney

155 Jokes  1 Videos

Winged 'emA bird flew into and damaged the engine of Vice President Dick Cheney's plane as it arrived in Chicago Friday morning.

Ever the outdoorsman, Cheney gutted and cleaned the bird,
then shot the pilot in the face for good measure.

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Papa's got a brand new douche bag

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: Apr 11, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!

Papa's got a brand new douche bagJames Brown topped BET’s
“25 Greatest Dancers” list.

M.C. Rove’s calls to BET about why he did not place have thus far gone unanswered.

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No Ballot, no bullets

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: Mar 22, 2007
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Election

525 Jokes  20 Videos

House Democrats pulled a bill today to grant Washington, D.C. a vote in the House, after Republicans offered a motion that would repeal the gun ban for the District.

So attention D.C. residents, you still can’t shoot a home intruder.
And if you don’t like that, you should write somebody else's congressman.

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Mormon the Merrier

By: Ernie Mccracken (C)
Submitted: Mar 7, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Mitt Romney

35 Jokes  1 Videos

Mormon the Merrier.

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