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Mark Jabo
Mark Jabo




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I am a stand-up comic, sit-down writer and semi-reclining producer. I split my time between New York, Maryland and Florida. Recently co-authored a book, "The Sky is Falling! A Global Warming Survival Guide."Time Magazine's Person of the Year, 2006\Find me doing something at:www.comedyblockparty.comwww.markjabo.comwww.getmehot.blogspot.comwww.pointsincase.com/writers/mark_jabo.htm\\\
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80 Jokes  

Mark Jabo
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P is for...Paparazzi

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 5, 2006
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Paparazzi

24 Jokes





 Kitty litter.


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Mark Jabo
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Baby, If You've Ever Wondered...

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 4, 2006
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Cincinnati Bengals

51 Jokes

 

Cincinnati Bengals rookie wide receiver, Reggie McNeal, was arrested  in Houston over the weekend and charged with resisting arrest.

McNeal is the seventh Cincinnati football player to have been arrested in the past year, setting a new single season mark for the Bengals and helping them clinch a playoff spot on the FBI's Most Wanted List.

Prior to next week's game, Vegas oddsmakers have made the Bengals an early two-touchdown favorite over the guards.

Meanwhile, Bengals coaches declined to comment on the budding quarterback controversy between Adam Sandler and Burt Reynolds.

Photo:
Bengal veterans use Gatorade as a lubricant prior to McNeal's rookie prison "initiation."   Prison welcoming ritual reportedly the inspiration behind Gatorade's ad slogan, "Is it in you?"



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Mark Jabo
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I Believe I Can Fry

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 4, 2006
Category: Blogs  
From Hot Topic

Crystal Meth

61 Jokes  1 Videos

 





A local businessman has spent over $300,000 of his own money to help improve the reputation of the state of Mississippi through a new website and a series of ad posters.

National studies consistently rank Mississippi near the bottom of the country in education, housing and teeth and near the top in poverty, obesity and lynchings.  

Undaunted, ad executive Rick Looser is trying to put a positive spin on the state's good qualities while at the same time trying to live down a lifetime of jokes about his last name.


Pictured here:  All 12 people in the state who can read and write




Mississippi Facts & Figures

Cities:
Jackson, Biloxi, Trent Lott Trailer Park
Climate:
Tornado magnet
Economy: 
Cotton, catfish, crystal meth
Population: 2,921,088 (Black persons: 36.8%; White persons: 1.3%; Inbred white persons: 60.0%; Asian person: Lost on way to Florida; Jewish persons: "Don't go makin' me git my shotgun, boy.")
State flag:

"Have you got something French with just a hint of racism..."


State motto:  Virtute et armis, Latin for "yeeeee-haw"
State tree: Anything with strong branches

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Mark Jabo
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The Points On Your License Don't Matter

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 4, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Cop

1357 Jokes  15 Videos







Local activists were outraged when a Tempe, Arizona cable channel showed a white police officer telling two black men they could get out of a littering ticket by performing a rap.




The officer involved was suspended without pay but will appear next week as a guest host for Drew Carey on Whose Line Is It Anyway.

In a related story:  Rodney King said to be considering move to Tempe.



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Breast in Show

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 4, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Weight Loss

240 Jokes  3 Videos

 



The NY Post reports State Senator Liz Krueger has introduced a "Breast-feeding Bill of Rights."









This legislation is long overdue.  Too often, guys just doesn't know where they stand and what their rights are when it comes to a woman's breasts.   Men everywhere should applaud Senator Krueger's efforts to....wait, what?...it's a "Breast Feeding Bill of Rights for Mothers?"  ....Uh, never mind.

Elsewhere, police announced that 427 new mothers were arrested in a pre-dawn raid as Mayor Bloomberg's ban on trans fat went into effect.


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Mark Jabo
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Hissy Fit

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 2, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Animal

1055 Jokes  34 Videos

 



Snake king Ali Khan dies from cobra bite.



Follow up story: Internet death pool announces lowest ever payout


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Love Me Like A Rock

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 2, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Space

277 Jokes  3 Videos


 


Scientists warn an asteroid big enough to wipe out mankind is overdue and could strike at any time.



Story engenders spike in credit card debt and propositions to good-looking women everywhere.


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Mark Jabo
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Be Adequite

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 1, 2006
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Lindsay Lohan

106 Jokes  2 Videos


Lindsay Lohan's mother confirmed that her daughter had checked herself into a local Alcoholics Anonymous program.

The actress was said to be serious about adhering to the organization's famous (12st step) program.

Lohan also promised friends that later this month she will enter a Hooked on Phonics program.



http://news.independent.co.uk/world/americas/article2023859.ece

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Mark Jabo
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Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better...

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 1, 2006
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Pope

112 Jokes  1 Videos



This just in from the Reuters news wire: Pope Benedict wound up a fence-mending visit to Turkey on Friday amid praise from the local press for visiting Istanbul's Blue Mosque and praying toward Mecca "like Muslims."




Benedict also won praise for his promise to attach explosives to the Popemobile and drive it into an embassy.


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Facebook

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 1, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Facebook

49 Jokes  41 Videos







Computer programmers took the features from top comedians and combined them to generate a computer image of the "perfect" comic face.











Mr. and Mrs. Jabo took the features from two generations of immigrant Polish and Scottish families and combined them to generate an image of the "perfect" face for scaring little kids at parties.

 







Japanese researchers took features from two generations of Sony Playstations and combined them to make the "perfect" head for playing video games.




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