NBA star Kobe Bryant and his wife are being sued by their maid. She claims she was, "badgered, harrassed and humiliated". Coincidently, the same claim has been filed by the Los Angeles Lakers.

There will be no more standing in lines to get tickets for the Easter Egg Roll at the White House. Instead, for the first time, the tickets will be distributed online. The White House stated that online ticket distribution will reduce the number of Americans having to wait in very long lines. Adding that the only long lines Americans should be standing in are lines for unemployment, pawn shops, and food banks.

A 31-year-old fruit-picker died after he was viciously attacked by two Komodo dragons.  Attacks by wild animals on humans have become quite frequent lately. Another incident was reported last night in LA when 5 angry cougars burst into a Chippendales Mens show, turns out it was just the cast of ‘The View’

Nearly a century after the Titanic struck ice in the North Atlantic, a federal judge in Virginia is poised to preserve the largest collection of its artifacts. The salvage company, RMS Titanic Inc lays claim to over 5,900 washed up artifacts. The only washed up artifact from Titanic that has yet to be claimed is Celine Dion.

A daguerreotype believed to be from 1848 shows what is now the Upper West Side of Manhattan. The photo is said to be the first photo of NYC. It is also believed to be the first photo taken by an annoying Japanese tourist.

3M - a diversified U.S. manufacturer known for Post-It notes and Scotch tape - recently announced layoffs among its 2,700 workers. Luc Rousselet, the director and current hostage of 3M's French operations stated  he refuses to show any signs of fear. That is, until several employees placed pieces of tape on his eyes and  mouth to make him appear like a frightened Asian man.

The wrestling superstar attended the Ocho Calle Latin festival in Miami two weekends ago, where her vocals were overshadowed by a spicy pole dance. The Hulkster stated that Brooke also has a pole at home that she practices on. Adding that she’s not allowed to use it too much because it’s the only pole in the trailer home that supports the roof .

The president said that his statement was in poor taste and that to assume anything otherwise is just retarded.