Barack Obama’s inauguration will come with a hefty price tag, estimated at more than $170 million.

The actual swearing in ceremony cost $1.24 million, and the federal government gave $75 million to neighboring states Virginia and Maryland to help pay for their share of police, fire and medical services.

The remainder of the money will go to the thug who put Cheney in a wheelchair.

Three New Jersey siblings whose names have Nazi connotations have been placed in state custody. The children, ranging in age from 3 to under 1, were removed from their parents home on Friday. They drew attention when a bakery refused to put the name of the oldest — Adolf Hitler Campbell — on a birthday cake.

Depsite not having the cake, the birthday party was a tremendous success, with the kids enjoying "SS" cupcakes, pizza with swastika-shaped pepperoni, and playing many rounds of "Duck, Duck, Gestapo."

Fourth-grader Gage Rothlingshofer won a $1,000 scholarship for growing cabbage.

Over 1.2 million students planted and took care of their own cabbage plants. One winner was selected from each state to win a $1,000 scholarship. Gage won in Pennsylvania, having grown the best cabbage based on size and appearance.

Gage lives in Heidelberg Township and helps out in his mom's garden. He says he wishes to be a WWE wrestler when he grows up.

He says this so the other kids won't kick his ass for growing giant cabbage with Mom in her garden. 

Crazy story. Thieves broke into tea gardens in Northeast India and stole tea leaves, damaged tea bushes and hurt the entire tea industry. 

Authorities offered a reward... and said the thieves are described as having very soothed lemony throats and are armed with large amounts of pee.

Authorities are questioning anyone in the area who seems ‘Englishly  gay’.

A man in Wisconsin was accused of faking heart attacks to avoid paying bills in restaurants and cabs.

His lawyer will defend him by siting precedent with the case of the People vs Fred Sanford.

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Detroit, MI

1.	Head southwest on Congress St W toward Griswold St		246 ft
2.	Turn right at Griswold St. Go to full serve gas station, refill, drive away without paying bill.		377 ft
3.	Turn left at W Fort St/ M-3 Continue to follow M-3		2.6 mi
4.	Turn left at Fisher Fwy W		184 ft
5.	Take the ramp on the left onto I-75 S Entering Ohio.   Pull over, spend 400k on snacks.		50.7 mi
6.	Slight left at I-280 S (signs for OHIO Turnpike/ I-280 S)		12.5 mi
7.	Take exit 1A to merge onto I-80 E/ I-90 E toward Cleveland Continue to follow I-80 E Toll road		147 mi
8.	Continue on I-76 E Partial toll road Entering Pennsylvania.   Ask Government to help pay for toll.		184 mi
9.	Take the US-30 exit toward I-70 E/ Breezewood/ Baltimore Partial toll road		0.6 mi
10.	Merge onto I-70 E Toll road.		1.3 mi
11.	Take the US-30 W exit toward I-70 E/ Washington DC/ Baltimore Toll road		0.3 mi
12.	Merge onto US-30		0.3 mi
13.	Turn left at I-70 E (signs for I-70 E/ Washington D.C./ Baltimore) Entering Maryland   Spend a few hours at resort.		75.8 mi
14.	Take exit 53 to merge onto I-270 S		32.2 mi
15.	Merge onto I-495 S Entering Virginia		3.6 mi
16.	Take exit 43-44 for Geo Wash Memorial Pkwy toward Washington		1.1 mi
17.	Merge onto George Washington Memorial Pkwy S. Remind yourself of the greatness of Washington during Washington's reign.		8.5 mi
18.	Take the US-50 E/ I-66 E exit toward Washington		0.4 mi
19.	Merge onto I-66 E Entering District of Columbia		0.6 mi
20.	Take the US-50 E exit toward CONSTITUTION Ave		0.2 mi
21.	Merge onto Constitution Ave NW/ US-50 Start groveling.		1.4 mi

Washington, DC

Driving directions to Washington, DC

A French airline hostess picked a chocolate wrapper out of the trash and found a winning ticket in a competition to fly to the upper reaches of the earth's atmosphere. 

Officials stated that if she doesn’t follow very strict flight procedure, she could possibly turn into a giant blueberry and be rolled away by little singing people. 

Tax increase for people who make more than 250k.

Tax break for people who make less than 250k.

Full audit for Joe The Plumber.

After years of declining sales, The Sharper Image declared bankruptcy.

The move comes after a miserable period of declining sales and plummeting share prices. For the 12 months ending Jan. 31, the San Francisco-based retailer posted a 13% dive in same-store sales -- those at outlets open at least a year -- while total store sales fell 15% to $311.2 million. Overall company sales cratered 26% to $374.9 million.

Even though many young people think politics are crooked, actress and Christian rocker Heidi Montag said she is definitely voting for John McCain. It’s likely she’s being pressured by her Republican Christian parents who said, “Even if she’s gonna get metaphorically fucked, it better be by a white guy.”