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WWW.VERBALCARTOONIST.COM is NOW UP AND RUNNING and voted BEST NEW COMEDY SITE.
Five days ago we hit 1,000 VISITS a day. Today I am at just under 1,400 individual visits a day. Find out Why.

Just recently came out with my book 'DISCONTINUED SOUP' Available through Barnes & Noble etc have done several years of stand up in NYC and the Midwest.

I have a weekly feature (Dan Liebert, Verbal Cartoonist) on www.mcsweeneys.net/links/danliebert. Also I have recorded weekly bits for national NPR's 'Fair Game' show.

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Lucy Logsdon (Guest) says:

Your stuff is hilarious. I found it because I read via Illinois Arts Council newsletter that a poetry recipient from Elizabethtown had won---and I found this David Sedaris--like stuff instead. Are you really living in the Elizabethtown in Southern Illinois--on the Ohio River? That's crazy!...

Beth Schumann says:

I'm sorry. I know I'm a total snot. I didn't think you stole my joke, I know that lots of people can come up with similar ideas. I was just having a bad day, a fight with my husband, etc. etc. I shouldn't have taken it out on you, sorry. Of course your joke is hilarious, because great minds think...

Ray Ellin says:

so funny... all of it.

Octavia Smith says:

I'm so loving this page.keep it coming.

Dan Liebert says:

Thanks Ray, I've enjoyed you many times from the balcony at the Strip. If you see DF tell him hello and be sure to let him know you like my stuff - he taught me.

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Joke Cloud (Popular Tags)

Joke List: Most Recent (From All Time)

Show Me: Most Recent | Highest Rated | Most Views | Most Shared | Most Comments

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82 Jokes  

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Brief Milk Carton Rant By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 25, 2007 Category: Weird

From Hot Topic Dirty Mouth 2100 Jokes  60 Videos

A milk carton that opens on either side. Would it fucking KILL them??? Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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Superstitions By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 24, 2007 Category: Weird

It's unlucky to be superstitious. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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My Cajun Chicken Recipe By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 23, 2007 Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

Friends are having a potluck tonight - I'll bring my specialty - Inadvertently Blackened Chicken. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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SLEEP SYSTEM By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 23, 2007 Category: Weird

'Window Treatments' I'm OK with. But calling a bed a 'Sleep System'??? A 'Sleep System' is two valium and a shot of Jack Daniels. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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GENDER STUDIES By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 21, 2007 Category: Weird

From Hot Topic Doctor 295 Jokes  2 Videos

I dated a woman who's majoring in 'Gender Studies'. Gender Studies? In second grade - we called that 'playing doctor'. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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NIGHT SCHOOL By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 20, 2007 Category: Weird

From Hot Topic School 933 Jokes  35 Videos

Thanks to Night School I found a new position at the office. Face down on my desk asleep. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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A TIP FOR STAND UPS By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 19, 2007 Category: Weird

I find that if I get out on stage and have stage fright that it helps relax me to picture the audience naked and masturbate. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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PHONE SEX By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 19, 2007 Category: Weird

From Hot Topic Dirty Mouth 2100 Jokes  60 Videos

Why pay $10-$15 a pop to have some woman fake an orgasm over the phone? Save up your money and get a real woman to fake it in person. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (2)  |  Rate it:

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Straight to Video Movies By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 18, 2007 Category: Weird

I was at a Dollar Store. They had blank video tapes for a buck and awful video movies for 49 cents. Its kind of scary. These movies are SO BAD they actually cheapen blank video tape. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:

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CARTOON PORN By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 18, 2007 Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

From Hot Topic Porn 198 Jokes  9 Videos

A guy ahead of me at Champagne Video was getting a stack of animated porn. I don't understand cartoon porn. Do you imagine you're a cartoon person while you masturbate to it? I'd be afraid I'd cum and my eyes would pop out fifty feet. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it: