The world is going to end in 2012. I know that because of the movie 2012, an action movie starring John Cusak?! Proof that the world is coming to an end.

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Congrats Kobe Bryant. He finally got the ring he should got his wife after he raped Katelyn Faber. Great job Los Angeles Fabers!

Joe “The Plumber” was said 23 times during the last debate. We should not be disrespectful, let’s call him by his real name, Joe “The Distraction.”

Some people say I’m a conspiracy nut and I don’t think that’s true. I just believe everything I’m not told 

Our government is having a tough time finding Osama Bin Laden; only because the Muslim Religion doesn’t allow tombstones.

Our government told us to never forget September 11^th. So that way we’ll forget how much they were scumbags on the 10^th.

Did you hear Sarah Palin named her kid with Down Syndrome “Trig”? Yeah, like that kid's ever gonna be able to do math. That's just cruel. What?! Are you going to have a kid in a wheelchair and name him Walker?!