Under pressure to meet combat needs, the Army and Marine Corps have been bringing in more recruits with felony convictions – including manslaughter and sex crimes.

'Cause really, who better to give a gun to and share a fox hole with? [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: army marines military funny
Added: Tue, 22 Apr 2008

Senator Ted Kennedy made a speech the other day endorsing Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama.
 
When candidate Hillary Clinton was asked how this would affect her relationship with Kennedy in the Senate she said, "We'll drive over that bridge when we come to it." [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Political
Keywords: politics comedy funny president democrats kennedy
Added: Tue, 29 Jan 2008

-- The NYPD is getting strict about facial hair, recently telling employees they can no longer sport goatees and chin strap beards, but would be allowed to keep the mustaches.
Mustache-wearing cops will now keep a trimmer in their lockers along with their 70's porn tapes and posters of the 86 Mets. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: nypd cops comedy news new york city
Added: Mon, 14 Jan 2008

A Chinese toy maker has recalled millions of toy beads after scientists found they contain a chemical that converts into a powerful date rape drug when ingested.

In other news...singer R. Kelly was seen completing his Christmas shopping early this year. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: comedy toys christmas
Added: Thu, 8 Nov 2007

A city official is suggesting birth control for pigeons that congregate
around the Staten Island ferry. The product called OvoControl P would be placed in rooftop bird feeders.

The pigeons seem very excited about the new contraception since they'd previously just been using the dirty condoms they found on the ferry terminal. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: comedy new york city birds
Added: Tue, 30 Oct 2007

Appearing on Donny Deutsch's CNBC show, "The Big Idea," on Monday night, columnist/author Ann Coulter suggested that the U.S. would be a better place if there weren't any Jewish people and that they needed to "perfect" themselves into -- Christians.

Coulter later admitted she was just upset because Jews invented the traditional circumcision -- hers went awry years ago and left her with a vagina. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Political
Keywords: religion politics coulter comedy jews christians
Added: Fri, 12 Oct 2007

Republicans are getting excited as the new Ann Coulter doll may hit store shelves just in time for the Christmas season.

The company who makes the doll says it is the same size as Barbie, but has the parts of Ken. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Political
Keywords: ann coulter politics republicans toys
Added: Wed, 10 Oct 2007

Madame Tussauds wax museum has just opened its doors in Washington DC.

According to their press release -- "the attraction will give visitors an interactive, full-sensory experience; they will be able to touch, see and hear celebrities in a way unlike any other Washington D.C. attraction."

Senator Larry Craig said he can't wait to get his statue erected. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Political
Keywords: political museum washington craig senator
Added: Fri, 5 Oct 2007

This is a parody song to the tune of that 80's hit, 'Bette Davis Eyes'

Her hair is often red
She hails from old L-I
But she may end up dead
Lindsay's got more D-U-I's
She snorts some coke and drinks booze
And then she likes to drive
She's always in the news
Lindsay's got more D-U-I's

Was a 'Mean Girl'
And a clean girl
But now she's a rehab scene girl
Gets arrested and then gets
More blood levels tested
At 21 it's no surprise
Lindsay's got more D-U-I's

Now a grown-up, she still throws up
In the back seat of her friend's truck
Found unconcious, yet she knows just
How to not become obnoxious
She can still turn on the guys
Even with her D-U-I's [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Entertainment
Keywords: lindsay lohan celebrity entertainment song
Added: Tue, 24 Jul 2007

13 year-old Evan O'Dorney of Danville, California, won the 2007 Scripps National Spelling Bee on Thursday.

When asked what he planned to do with his $35,000 cash prize, O'Dorney said, "Probably buy some hookers. Otherwise I'm never getting laid." [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: news spelling bee
Added: Fri, 1 Jun 2007

A 60-year-old New Jersey woman gave birth to twin boys Tuesday, becoming the oldest woman in the US to bear twins.

The new mother plans to breast feed the babies, even though children shouldn't really eat off the floor. [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: News
Keywords: babies mother birth news
Added: Wed, 23 May 2007

Kim Basinger denies she leaked a voicemail in which her ex-husband, Alec Baldwin, calls their 11-year-old daughter a "rude, thoughtless little pig."

She also denied making the movies "Nadine," "Blind Date" and "My Stepmother Is an Alien." [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Entertainment
Keywords: baldwin basinger entertainment
Added: Tue, 24 Apr 2007

We can't get to the phone right now...leave a message...beep

alec baldwin: you have insulted me for the last time...you don't have the brains or decency...i'm going to straigthen your ass out...you are a rude, thoughtless, little pig...

ireland: hello, daddy...what did i do?

Alec: I'm sorry honey...i thought i was calling uncle daniel [more]

Author: Meredith Daniels
Category: Entertainment
Keywords: entertainment baldwin
Added: Fri, 20 Apr 2007