Shrek beat Sex and The City at the box office this past weekend. It was quite a showdown between two very unique movies. One is about a hideous creature and all of it's friends, and the other one is Shrek.

 The man who inspired the title character in the movie 'Rain Man' died this past weekend. Rest in peace, George W. Bush

A Japanese man has married a woman he met in a dating simulation game. Needless to say, his family had something entirely different in mind when he told them he was going on a date to see Avatar.

Athens, GA- Police are looking for a woman who destroyed $1,000 worth of items in a store after being told she couldn't return items without a receipt. Police theorize this was not the source of her anger, however, since she had just tried a free sample of a new perfume called 'Menapause by Calvin Klein'.

 A New Zealand Santa with a droopy-eye has receieved 100,00 so his face does not scare children. In other news, it was revealed today that Santa Claus is a real person, and is actually Joan Rivers.

Tyler Perry has donated $1 million dollars to the NAACP for its' 100th anniversary celebration.

 He presented it a cerermony entitled "Tyler Perry's Tyler Perry presents a check to the NAACP for $1 million dollars"

A man at a Florida Bank of America was denied the opportunity to cash his wife's check because he was asked for thumbprint, when he had only prosthetic arms.

Bank of America apologized, and said next time they will ask armless customers to use their penis instead.

 The Iraqi journalist who threw a shoe at former President George W. Bush will be released early for good behavior.

However, this has lead to serious questions about the timing of the release. Such as, why didn't this happen sooner?

 Connecticut Senator Christopher Dodd has vowed to carry on Ted Kennedy's life work.

To prepare, he has already started drinking and practicing an Irish accent.

Secretary of State Hilary Clinton snapped during a conference in Africa when a translator mistakenly asked her what Bill Clinton thought of an issue, insisiting she runs the state department, not him. Further incensed, Hilary declared: "I'm the one who wears the pants in this relationship!"