A new survey has found that 69.1 percent of all professional athletes live a luxurious lifestyle. The other 30.9 percent are in prison. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Sat, 29 Nov 2008

Jockey Julien Leparoux has broken a 23-year-old Churchill Downs record for wins at a Fall Meet. For his achievement, he was awarded free membership in the lollipop guild. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Sat, 29 Nov 2008

Stephon Marbury has said that his suspicion of Mike D'Antoni is so deep he wouldn't trust him to walk his dog across the street. That’s all the more harsh when you consider that Marbury defended Michael Vick. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Sat, 29 Nov 2008

John Daly shot a 4 over 76 during his first day at the Australian Masters. If his score had been any higher it would have rivaled his blood alcohol level. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Sat, 29 Nov 2008

The Tennessee Titans wiped the field with the Detroit Lions on Thanksgiving Day.  We haven't seen a mismatch that bad since the original Thanksgiving. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Sat, 29 Nov 2008

John Daly recently spoke about his past troubles, saying, "I'll get through anything people can throw at me." Especially if it happens to be a six-pack and a carton of cigarettes.
  [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Thu, 27 Nov 2008

The International Olympic Committee has decided to cut the modern pentathlon from five events to four, by combining pistol shooting and running. The favorite is clearly Maurice Clarett. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Thu, 27 Nov 2008

The NFL will broadcast next week's Chargers-Raiders game live in 3-D at theaters across the country. The image is expected to be so enhanced that Al Davis might even look life-like. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Thu, 27 Nov 2008

Rumors persist that Charlie Weis' buyout at Notre Dame is smaller than originally thought. It's believed to be the first time the words "smaller" and "Charlie Weis" have ever been uttered in the same sentence. Except to say, "Hey, that offensive lineman is much smaller than Charlie Weis." [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Thu, 27 Nov 2008

The Pittsburgh Pirates have signed two javelin-throwing reality show contestants who have never played organized baseball. It's nice to know they'll have something in common with the rest of their teammates. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Thu, 27 Nov 2008

Roger Clemens' former trainer Brian McNamee is providing a DNA sample to authorities to bolster his accusation that the pitcher used steroids. He'll have it as soon as he swabs the front seat of Mindy McCready's truck. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Wed, 26 Nov 2008

Pacman Jones is reportedly down to his last chance with the Dallas Cowboys. It's nice to hear the team is holding firm to its policy of twelve strikes and you're out. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Wed, 26 Nov 2008

The White Sox have reached a tentative agreement with 19-year-old Cuban star Dayan Viciedo. The infielder should have no problem passing his physical given the fact he swam all the way from Havana. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Wed, 26 Nov 2008

The Florida Marlins have received approval for a new downtown stadium. The proposed structure is expected to have a giant video screen, a retractable roof and seating for both of the team's fans. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Wed, 26 Nov 2008

Lab technicians from the World Anti-Doping Agency are currently testing Viagra for its use as a performance-enhancing drug. At least that's the story they've told their wives. [more]

Author: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
Category: Sports
Keywords: sports
Added: Wed, 26 Nov 2008