According to All Headline News, Three year-old German Shepherd, Hritik, has reportedly taken up a yoga class in India. His trainer in Ranchi, located in the state of Mumbai, is keeping a close eye on the german shepherd as he practices the traditional exercises. This now gives new meaning to the term "downward facing dog."

Thank you, Ill be here all week. Tip the Veal, try the waitress. 

A new report claims that over 75 percent of Americans are not up to date on the war and the US military's ongoing presence and battles overseas. This statement is further reflected in the following knock knock joke portraying the average American.

KNOCK KNOCK:

Who's there?

HEZBOLLAH?

Hezbollah who?

I went to Morrissey Night at a danceclub.

It was great!

$2.00 beers, Only Morrissey music all night long, and on your way out they gave you some rope to hang yourself with.

New reports show that Natalee Holloway is not dead. She is just lost inside IKEA.

Now that John Mark Karr seems to not be the killer of Jon Benet Ramsey, Friends and Family of the Ramsey's were upset because Patsy Ramsey died of Cancer not knowing who murdered her daughter.

At first I thought, who cares? Then I realized- it is sad that Patsy Ramsey died of Cancer not knowing that she murdered her daughter.

Rumors about President Bush's daughters drinking and partying problems were stirred up again today, when during a Press Conference George mistankingly refered to his daughters as "Jenna" and "Tonic".

George learned the hard way that it's never a good idea to pick his daughters up at the bar before last call.