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Marlena *
Marlena *


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Views: 640     |     Jokes: 133     |     Videos: 0     |     Comments: 0     |     DailyComedy Fans: 2
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Marlena *
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7 year Old Steals Grandma's SUV goes Joyriding

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Apr 28, 2008
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Cop

1357 Jokes  15 Videos

The juvenile took grandma's keys and SUV. Drove to the next town hitting 2 parked cars and 2 movings cars along the way. He was arrested and is being charged with grand theft auto.

In other news Grand Theft Auto IV will be released tomorrow, coincidence or publicity stunt.

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Marlena *
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Teacher Accused Of Quieting Kids With Clothespins

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Apr 6, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

School

933 Jokes  35 Videos

In a letter to parents Monday, Amanda-Clearcreek Primary School principal Mike Johnsen said Ruth Ann Stoneburner confirmed last week's incident. Johnsen also wrote that the four boys told him spring-type clothespins had been put on their lips for talking too much in class.

Evidently the school has not heard of Ridalin.

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Coca Growers Demand Coke Name Change

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Mar 16, 2007
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Cocaine

130 Jokes  2 Videos

Bolivia's coca growers are taking on an American soft-drink icon.

The farmers want the word "Coca" dropped by Coca-Cola. They argue the potent shrub belongs to the cultural heritage of the Andean nation, where the coca leaf infuses everyday life and is sacred to many.
The commission is part of an effort led by President Evo Morales to rehabilitate the image of the plant. It's been used in the Andes for millennia, but is better known internationally as the base ingredient of cocaine.

In additional news Columbians told Coca- Cola not to even think about changing it's name to just "Coke".

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Marlena *
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US Postal Service Rolling out R2-D2

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Mar 15, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Star Wars

34 Jokes  7 Videos

US Postal Service Rolling out R2-D2The United Postal Service will help promote "Star Wars' " 30th anniversary by dressing the street mailboxes like R2-D2. Additionally to celebrate "Saturday Night Fever's" 30th anniversay all mail carriers will put on their "boogie shooes" just to boogie with you.

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Copy machines may hold your ID

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Mar 15, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Dirty Mouth

2100 Jokes  60 Videos

The hard drives in copy machines store your info and make you susceptible to Identity Theft. So someone could be running around with your ass print.

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"Unicorn Defense" Misunderstanding

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Mar 15, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Cop

1357 Jokes  15 Videos

Turns out Phillip Holliday did not blame a unicorn for driving his truck into a lampost, because that would be silly everyone knows unicorns can't drive.
He said an unnamed woman was driving the truck.
Prosecutors call this the "Unicorn Defense", when someone blames some mythical person for the crime.
It seems that the Deputy Prosecutor did not get the memo that the phrase had been changed from the "OJ Defense"

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Marlena *
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$1,000 Pizza Features Caviar, Lobster

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Mar 15, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

New York

1180 Jokes  34 Videos

Nino's Bellisima Pizza restaurant in New York is now offering a grand pizza -- or rather -- a pizza costing a grand. Nino was quoted, "If I could only sell one it would be show how stupid the rich really are".

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Marlena *
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Exotic pet gives narcotics investigators scare

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Feb 12, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Crystal Meth

61 Jokes  1 Videos

Exotic pet gives narcotics investigators scareScared the investigators so much they forgot they were there for a drug bust. They confiscated the animal and then it was taken to an undisclosed animal sanctuary. 4 hours later, the investigators remembered why they were at that property to begin with and busted the resident with methamphetamine. They are going to let him slide on the drug charge, but he will be ticketed for his exotic thingy ma-jig.

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Marlena *
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Farmers Trade Coffee Shops For Online Forums

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Feb 12, 2007
Category: News  

Farmers Trade Coffee Shops For Online ForumsGreat! "Now To Catch a Predator" is going to have to keep an eye on the barns too.

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Marlena *
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Newest BlackBerry Comes With 'Pearl' Navigation

By: Marlena * (C)
Submitted: Feb 12, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Cell Phone

209 Jokes  14 Videos

Newest BlackBerry Comes With 'Pearl' NavigationAlso, for a mere $24.99 you can upgrade your cellular plan and the new BlackBerry 8800 will wipe your ass for you.

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I am an up and coming comedienne out of Houston, Texas. Check me out on my space:www.myspace.com/marlenacomedienne
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