Kyle Buis Joke Feed powered by DailyComedy.com http://www.dailycomedy.com/u/KyleBuis http://www.dailycomedy.com/images/users/m/KyleBuis.jpg Kyle Buis http://www.DailyComedy.com/u/KyleBuis The latest jokes from Kyle Buis courtesy of DailyComedy.com Kyle Buis <![CDATA[The Televangical Strangler]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6816 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6816/#comment Entertainment

A Texas bodybuilder said televangelist Pat Robertson threatened to kill him and his family over a lawsuit involving Robertson's miracle protein diet shake.
He's is right to fear Robertson's almighty power. After all, the preacher has said he can leg press 2,000 pounds, he can steer the path of hurricanes and he knows gay people caused the Sept. 11 attacks. Anyone crazy enough to believe all of that would make the perfect serial killer. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Entertainment
Keywords:
Added: Sun, 18 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6816 Sun, 18 Feb 2007 21:23:23 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Zombies love the kids]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6815 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6815/#comment News

A child molester was sentenced to 800 years to life for molesting three young boys. The punishment is 375 years shy of what the prosecutor hoped for. After all, it's a known fact that child molesters tend to rise from the grave as zombies that hunger for human flesh — but only after 1,100 years. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: News
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Added: Sun, 18 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6815 Sun, 18 Feb 2007 21:22:25 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[A bright idea?]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6610 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6610/#comment Political

A California lawmaker wants to get rid of incandescent light bulbs by the year 2012 because they only convert five percent of the energy they receive. Next on his list of things-to-get-rid-of-that-take-a-lot-of-resources and-put-out-very-little — the state legislature. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Political
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6610 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 18:05:27 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Dance Dance? How about recess?]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6609 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6609/#comment News

West Virginia schools are bringing in the game “Dance Dance Revolution” to trim the waistlines of its students. The decision comes on the heels of a study that found that children who played it for 30 minutes five days a week ended up in better shape. An unnamed school official said, “Recess was an option, but it just didn't waste enough money.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: News
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6609 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 18:04:19 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[My eyes!]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6608 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6608/#comment Weird

A Dutch gym plans to introduce “Naked Sunday,” a time when people can work out in the nude. Because of the laws of supply and demand, blindfolds will be offered for $50. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Weird
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6608 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 18:03:20 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Slowly but surely]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6607 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6607/#comment Entertainment

Microsoft's long-awaited operating system, Vista, hit store shelves Tuesday. Apple chief executive officer Steve Jobs applauded Bill Gates' company for, “finally catching up to Mac OS X. Well, at least the one that came out in 2003.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Entertainment
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6607 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 18:01:38 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Prince Charles' house]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6606 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6606/#comment Sports

England's Prince Charles took a break from his trip to the U.S. to shoot some hoops in Harlem on Sunday. The 58-year-old prince stunned the crowd with a no-look, reverse slam dunk and proclaimed afterward, “I do believe this is my house now, fellows.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Sports
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6606 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 18:00:46 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Do we heart him?]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6605 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6605/#comment Political

Former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee recently launched his presidential bid. Huckabee said he would bring a lot of heart to the race once he could come up with a slogan. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Political
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6605 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:59:53 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Snip snip]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6604 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6604/#comment Weird

Belgian veterinarians said an iguana named Mozart wasn't worried about the amputation procedure that would rid him of his weeklong erection because, “he doesn't know what amputation means.” Mozart may not understand the word “amputation,” but once he sees where the knife is going, he'll be more than a little worried. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Weird
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6604 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:59:07 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Protect our teachers]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6603 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6603/#comment News

Schools in the United Kingdom are being encouraged by a government committee to tell parents if their children are overweight or obese. Teachers in those schools will be required to take self-defense classes before telling parents, “Your kid is fat.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: News
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6603 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:58:31 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Searching for nothing]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6602 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6602/#comment Weird

Birdwatchers flocked to Chico, CA over the weekend for the eighth annual Snow Goose Festival. There was no winner in the snipe hunt for the eighth consecutive year. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Weird
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6602 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:57:57 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Guy goes to community service]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6601 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6601/#comment Entertainment

Joe Francis, founder of the “Girls Gone Wild” series, was recently fined $500,000 and sentenced to 200 hours of community service. Francis will spend those 200 hours giving motivational speeches to young men in which he'll demonstrate how valuable a video camera and a few beads can be. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Entertainment
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6601 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:57:08 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[What about the chillins?]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6600 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6600/#comment Entertainment

Denny Doherty, the last male member of folk group The Mamas and The Papas, passed away Friday. The widowed Mamas were told in the will to “go where you want to go.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Entertainment
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6600 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:56:15 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[Set in our ways]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6599 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6599/#comment Political

Chico Congressman Wally Herger voted against all six bills proposed by Democrats in their 100 hours plan. Herger later explained, “It's only 34 degrees in hell right now. That's not frozen enough for me to agree with them liberals yet.” [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Political
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6599 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:55:40 -0700 Kyle Buis
Kyle Buis <![CDATA[20,000 strong (and growing)]]> http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6598 http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6598/#comment Political

Gen. George Casey said Friday that the proposed surge of more than 20,000 soldiers to Iraq should stabilize security in Iraq and that those troops would be home by June. To replace these soldiers, genetically engineered pigs will fly in to complete the ironic image. [more]


Author: Kyle Buis
Category: Political
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Added: Tue, 6 Feb 2007

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http://www.dailycomedy.com/joke/6598 Tue, 6 Feb 2007 17:55:13 -0700 Kyle Buis