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[Stand Up] Kelli does drag. Or not.

Define -ahem- "drag queen"

By: Kelli Dunham

Views: 18

[Stand Up] Kelli's stepdad has dementia, but that's not the funny part. From Kelli's second award ...

It's My Family and I'll Cry If I Want To

By: Kelli Dunham

Views: 93

[Stand Up] From the award winning comedy CD "Almost Pretty"

61 Sorority Girls and Me

By: Kelli Dunham

Views: 90

[Stand Up] Not for the weak of heart...from Kelli Dunham's award winning second comedy CD "Almost ...

Death Comedy Jam

By: Kelli Dunham

Views: 84

[Stand Up] Kelli Dunham is a freak of nature, or....

Freak of nature

By: Kelli Dunham

Views: 43

Jokes

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A first lady you can....

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Feb 4, 2008
Category: Political

From Hot Topic

Hillary Clinton
250 Jokes 11 Videos

At the 93 March on Washington, Lea Delaria said that Hillary Clinton was "finally...a first lady you could f***."

I met Ms Clinton for work a few years ago and I confess I had some gloves and lube in my pocket. Just, yknow, in case.

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Doctors will say anything...

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 28, 2008
Category: Entertainment Staff Pick!

From Hot Topic

Doctor
289 Jokes 2 Videos

Doctors will say anything to fat people. First of all, if you're fat, that's what the problem is. Gallbladder problems? Faaaat. Headaches? Lose some weight blimpo! Cause of that nasty gunshut wound to the neck? The obesity epidemic, obviously.

And they'll suggest anything. I had knee problems and my doctor told me a gastric bypass would help with that. It did, but buying better shoes would have helped too, and I wouldn't be shitting myself every time I eat cottage cheese.

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Running from what?

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 19, 2008
Category: Entertainment

From Hot Topic

Parents
1199 Jokes 27 Videos

I don't understand people who run marathons. "oh it's for my health." No, you run 3 miles for your health, you run 26 miles because your mother didn't love you enough. What are you running from, your overarching lack of self esteem?

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Really?

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 16, 2008
Category: Entertainment Staff Pick!

I'm reading a book about writing right now, instead of writing, which is kind of meta-ironic if you think about it. Anyway, on the back cover it has this quote from Red Smith "to write, sit down at a typewriter and open a vein." Isn't that a tad dramatic? Is it really that bad? Realistically, it's not like being a coal minder. For chrissakes it's a job you can do in bed.

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Super sad!

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 13, 2008
Category: Entertainment

From Hot Topic

Religion
1017 Jokes 22 Videos

Tell-tale sign of depression. You say "well, life is short" and hear yourself following up with "thank god."

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You know what turns me on...

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 11, 2008
Category: Entertainment

From Hot Topic

Porn
197 Jokes 9 Videos

...self care. Got your 12 month check up today? That's hot! Do you floss? Cue the porn music. When I find a woman who washes her hands before she sits down to eat? Holy soap and water, I'll follow her anywhere....

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And by good, I mean...

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 10, 2008
Category: Weird

From Hot Topic

Religion
1017 Jokes 22 Videos

The bumper stickers that say "god is good all the time" crack me up. I mean, I might buy the "god is good" part but not the "all the time" part. I mean, really..."all the time"...really? Is this the same god that gives one kid a pony and another leukemia?

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How is it milk?

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 9, 2008
Category: Weird Staff Pick!

So I like the taste of soymilk but I don't quite get it, how is it milk? I mean, except for being a white semi-opaque liquid. Is that all it takes? And who gets paid to milk a soybean? Don't their hands keep slipping off the tiny little udders?

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When you really want to have sex...

By: Kelli Dunham (C)
Submitted: Jan 7, 2008
Category: Entertainment

From Hot Topic

Dirty Mouth
2078 Jokes 60 Videos

When you are waiting to have sex and you really want to have it...everything makes you horny. Reading the ingredients on a box of cereal. The smell of laundry detergent. Listening to "Car Talk" on NPR. Totally random things.

"What is that? The theme song from The Golden Girls? Damn, I think I just came!"

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