John Delery - Comedian (C)

John Delery

Registered on: 12/18/06
Location: NJ
URL: http://www.dailycomedy.com/u/JohnDelery

Biography:

I'm a comedy writer trapped in a copy editor's body. Please free me. Please.
Page Views: 845     |     Jokes: 14     |     Videos: 0     |     Comments: 1     |     Fans: 1
Latest Jokes  
  1 2  Next
Either that or Strom is spawning from the grave

Submitted: Aug 7, 2008
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

John McCain

143 Jokes  12 Videos

This just in: Rare 111-year-old reptile to become a father.

Uh-oh. A scandal like this could really hurt the McCain campaign.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
Ooh, baby, baby

Submitted: Jun 25, 2008
Category: News  Staff Pick!

Mayor Carolyn Kirk denies that 17 girls at Gloucester High School in Massachusetts made a pact to become pregnant and raise their babies together. Kirk now attributes the rash of pregnancies to the school’s insanely successful Breeding Is Fundamental program.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
OK, time to disband the Kulture Kops. Now!

Submitted: Feb 8, 2008
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Weight Loss

47 Jokes  3 Videos

In an attempt to shed light on the obesity epidemic nationwide and in the fattest state in the U.S., three state representatives are proposing a bill that would ban obese customers from restaurants in Mississippi.

Hey, if the plan works at the state level, Congress is thinking of amending the Patriot Act to include the obese on the FBI’s no-fry list.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
Dead-letter department

Submitted: Nov 19, 2007
Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

A friend of mine has Traumatic-Post Stress Syndrome, or what he calls fear of mail. I figure he inherited the condition from his father, who works for the post office. He’s a carrier, after all.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (3)  |  Rate it:
Lawn Order: Special Victims' Unit

Submitted: Sep 20, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!

Utah police desperate to reach their quota of WTF arrests, apprehended a 70-year-old Orem woman, and, after a struggle, charged her with “failing to maintain her landscaping.” Besides being an eyesore, authorities say a brown lawn violates Utah’s strictly enforced Whitest State West of Vermont edict.

“I’d a thought by now that homeowners around here woulda learned that brown lawns is as offensive as black skin,” said the arraignment judge, Klayton K. Klancy.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
Copulation explosion!

Submitted: Sep 13, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!

A Russian governor encouraged workers to stay home and make love to help boost the nation’s dwindling birth rate. And to help raise money to recharge the U.S. economy, the Speaker of the House urged every member of Congress to return to their home states and screw the middle class!

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:
E.D. go home

Submitted: Aug 27, 2007
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Viagra

47 Jokes  1 Videos

Eeeeeeeeesh! Just saw the disturbing "Viva Viagra" TV commercial, and afterward all I wanted was a stiff drink. Stop all the smirking, guys: No matter what the makers of "natural male enhancements" say, an erection does not count as personal growth.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:
Hey, check your policy, too!

Submitted: Jun 15, 2007
Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

I have a new girlfriend! Actually, we're “friends with benefits,” though not in the usual sense of that expression. We're not having sex…but I am on her dental plan.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
Incarcerate her in a playpenitentiary

Submitted: Apr 12, 2007
Category: Weird  

Police in Florida arrested a 6-year-old pupil at Avon Elementary School and charged her with three crimes after the girl allegedly threw a felony tantrum. Teach this li’l crimin'l a lesson now, I say, before she goes on a rampage at recess and becomes a serial kicker.

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
You can't book this tour from any travel agency!

Submitted: Apr 11, 2007
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Afghanistan

32 Jokes

Beginning immediately, soldiers deploying to Iraq and Afghanistan will serve 15 months instead of 12 months in the two war zones. It’s “a difficult but necessary interim step,” Secretary of Defense Robert Gates says, adding, “An extended trip overseas? Most people would kill for that — which, incidentally, is all we’re asking of these troops.”

Share via: Share this joke via Email!Email  Share this joke on Facebook!Facebook  Share this joke on MySpace!MySpace  Stumble It!  del.icio.us  Digg This!  Embed code!  |  Comments (0)  |  Rate it:
  1 2  Next
Sponsored By:
Upcoming Gigs
No events in schedule.
Heckler's Corner

Jim Cady says:

Love all your stuff. Great Work!!!