A judge in Washington ruled that paper money is unfair to blind people.What he didn't see is being blind is unfair to blind people. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords: unfair blind james craven
Added: Tue, 28 Nov 2006

 President Bush announced today there would be no Premature Pullout of Iraq “We are here to screw Iraqi’s for along time.” [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: Political
Keywords:
Added: Tue, 28 Nov 2006

Things you can only say at Thanksgiving!    1. Talk about a huge breast!  2. Tying the legs together keeps the inside moist.   3. It's Cool Whip time!  4. If I don't undo my pants, I'll burst!  5. Whew, that's one terrific spread!  6. I'm in the mood for dark meat.  7. Are you ready for seconds yet?  8. It's a little dry, do you still want to eat it?   9. Just wait your turn, you'll get some.  10. Don't play with your meat.  11. Just spread the legs open and stuff it in.  12. Do you think you'll be able to handle all these people at once?  13. I didn't expect everyone to come at once!   14. You still have a little bit on your chin.   15. How long will it take after you stick it in?  16. You'll know it's ready when it pops up.  17. Wow, I didn't think I could handle all of that!  18. That's the biggest one I've ever seen!   19. How long do I beat it before it's ready? [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords: james craven thanksgiving
Added: Thu, 16 Nov 2006

       Recently our government did a study to see how much porn was on the internet.  And surprisingly every single one of their favorite lists came up in as internet porn. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Wed, 15 Nov 2006

Does anyone realize how hard it is to learn the english language, with all of the different sounds and pronounciations, and words that sound the same but meanings are completly differentFor example: bear(animal) bare (naked)dick (penis) Dick (Someone's name)merry (happy) marry (not so happy)You get my point.So next time you see someone struggling with the English language, remember there is alot to learn and be patient (kindess) with them our you may end up a patient (seeking medical attention) at your local hospital. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Fri, 10 Nov 2006

 The 49ers have finally have had enough of the San Fransico lifestyle and have decided to play elsewhere in hopes that the team will stop playing like a bunch of pansies. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: Sports
Keywords:
Added: Thu, 9 Nov 2006

 I was reading that in Australia you can buy a cup of coffee made out of special coffee beans for $50. And you my be thinking what makes this beans so special? Are they rare beans? They aren't rare beans, they are deficated beans. You heard me right? Coffee Beans that are harvested from feces. Someone actually got the idea to pick coffee beans from the poop of a wild animal that eats the coffee beans, then roast'em, then grind'em, and then drink it. Like coffee didn't taste like shit already. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Wed, 8 Nov 2006

In New York you can now change your gender on your birth certificate. If you no longer feel like being the sex you were born as, change it to whatever makes you more comfortable, which in turn makes the person sitting next to you on the subway more uncomfortable.This also looks like it can open the backdoor to gay marriage as well. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords: gender changing james craven
Added: Wed, 8 Nov 2006

   It seems that Brittany Spears has finally had enough of that bum K-Fed.  But it seems to be a little too late; he has wrecked her.... Not only her career but her body too.When they met everything on Brittany was right were it should be, but not know not after K-fed was done with her.  Her tight little body has reached maximum density with stretch marks to prove it.  She's no longer perky up top either, they will or are already sagging after squeezing out a couple of puppies, which leads me to the cavernous part of her body which will no longer be the thoughts of young boys wet dreams.Great job K-Fed, You Screwed It Up For All Of Us! [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: Entertainment
Keywords: brittany spears k-fed james craven
Added: Wed, 8 Nov 2006

 "The fact is I am guilty of sexual immorality. And I take responsibility for the entire problem. I am a deceiver and a liar. There's a part of my life that is so repulsive and dark that I have been warring against it for all of my adult life," So we aren't all so different after all. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Sun, 5 Nov 2006

Doogie Howser M.D. has openly admitted recently to being gay and is now changing his specialty to proctology. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords:
Added: Sun, 5 Nov 2006

All of your pants have an elastic waistbandYou are done eating and you can hear your skin actually stretchYou have your cholesterol checked and it comes back: BACONIt takes 2 hands to masturbate 1 to hold your stomach up and the other 1 to do it.Your sweat smells like hot dog waterYou have your own gravitational pullThe all you can eat buffet cuts you offRichard Simmons comes to your houseJust hearing the word bacon, hotdog, and buffet make you hungryYou’re a stunt double for John GoodmanIf this is you or someone you know get help before they have to cut the wall out! [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords: james craven fat jokes obese
Added: Fri, 3 Nov 2006

If you are uneducated and not willing to make the most of your life you end up in Iraq. And if you are educated, a drunk, and like to fool around with teenage boys you end up in the Senate. [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: Political
Keywords:
Added: Tue, 31 Oct 2006

 "Mommie Dearest" Madonna  has a strong resemblance to Joan Crawford who too adopted childeren for publicity purposes. Can't you just picture Madonna screaming "No Wire Hangers!" [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: Entertainment
Keywords: madonna james craven
Added: Tue, 31 Oct 2006

It seems St. Louis has Detroit's number. This time they beat Detroit for the most Dangerous city in the country according to a recent poll.  This was another sure victory that the experts expected out of Detroit. There's always next year Detroit!!! [more]

Author: James Craven
Category: News
Keywords: james craven most dangerous city
Added: Mon, 30 Oct 2006