In his comments on the current jobless "recovery" yesterday, President Obama said he is looking "at new models for where future growth is going to come from." 

"We'll look at anything, except capitalism of course, that's crazy talk," he said.

The Sun's enormous plasma balls may wipe out our technology-driven civilization, says  NaturalNews.com.

"Natural fluctuations in the sun's atmosphere could cause it to fire a giant plasma ball at Earth, shutting down the planet's electric grids and leading to widespread social collapse, according to a report from the U.S. National Academy of Sciences (NAS).

In other words, if the sun decides to "teabag" us, we're dead.  Thought you'd want to know. 

Barack Obama has won the Nobel Peace Prize for attempting to rid the world of nuclear weapons.  In an extremely close vote, Obama beat out my dog Pogo who was nominated for her numerous unsuccessful attempts to catch a squirrel.   

Clinton always does well with the ladies, even in a police state.  I'd sure like to be in that 757 on the way home.  What a party. 

Governor Mark Sanford's titillating revelations of an affair with a woman from Buenos Aires, Argentina is another indication of just how far the Republicans will go to win the Latin(a) vote....

 (Somebody had to say it.)

David Axelrod, presidential flack and red-diaper baby,  pronounced Barack Obama holy.  When asked about the president's first hundred days in office, he said, it was a "hallmark holiday."  

Axelrod added: "not even Jesus can touch this."

After a 32 year career at GM, CEO Rick Wagoner was forced out by the Obama administration. 

The White House says he will retire after a brief trial and speedy execution.