In related news, Joan Rivers cancels big Democratic fund raiser.  

Richie was visited by her friend Paris Hilton who coincidentally has also spent lots of time flat on her back.

And Larry King was named "sexiest man not alive."

The doctor slapped the baby and then he slapped Cheney to restart his heart.

In lieu of a traditional baptism, the child will be waterboarded. 

Sarah Palin was upset by a Newsweek cover that showed her wearing a skimpy outfit.  John McCain was also upset--that Palin didn't wear that outfit on the campaign trail.

In annual survey, Afghanistan was second only to Illinois.

Police said trespassing charges would not be filed against Rosie O'Donnell.

Elton John says he's back on his feet after being sidelined for the flu, E. Coli,  and a yeast infection.

President Obama chastised the Chinese leadership for China's lack of freedom of speech.  To which one of the Chinese leaders replied, "Freedom of speech is dangerous.  We've heard Joe Biden speak."