In fairness, Nixon didn't have three judge openings on American Idol.  

Oh good, perhaps I can shave five minutes off my trip to the unemployment office. 

That means only one of the four Idol judges from last year remains.  Randy Jackson may want to consider changing deodorants.   

Those with no talent will have to hope they can get on a reality TV show.    

Must be a delivery vehicle.  

I bet whoever made that mistake will be called on the carpet.  

In related news, half the members of Congress cancelled their Internet service. .  

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer claimed that headless bodies were turning up in the Arizona desert because of violence along the US-Mexico border.  But the claim has come back to haunt her after her stammering debate performance in which she failed to back it up.  It seems the only one to lose their head is the governor. 

Ironically, she glanced down at her notes only to discover she didn't have the right papers.   

She blamed her poor performance on a bad batch of tequila.