We all know that she is a self obsessed, judgemental, insecure bulemic. But what about her downside? I spent a year of my life dedicated to this person. I knew she had serious issues right away, but she can be very charming and I really did fall for this girl. I had a lot of hope for us, I found her incredibly attractive, and to this day she is still one of the most beautiful women I have ever been with. I wanted a future with her. I won't lie and say that everything was perfect, it wasn't. We fought a lot, but not about anything serious, and nothing ever seemed to stick. In my lowest moment in the relationship we got drunk together and I smashed a wine bottle on her dorm room floor. But mostly I did for her. I cleaned her place for her. I helped her through he unending personal drama (anyone who reads her blogs can get a sense of what that's like) And I even wrote her act for her. Now I know what you are thinking. "Fat guy gets dumped by pretty girl and now he is bitter." That's not an entirely unreasonable thing to think, but there are many people, some of which who blog on this site who will testify to the fact that April made vast improvements during my brief time in NY. I'm here to tell you this was no coincidence. I was content to sit on all of this until now I was big enough to let old wounds close. I forgave her for donning the guise of "Dominguez" on this site and insulting me in this public forum. And finally and for the record I was not the anonymous guy bothering April. I will testify to that in a court of law. I'm sure they can trace the ISP to the home computer of whoever that was and we will find out that it was one of the other dozens of people who have an issue with April. So if things were so great what happened to us? I moved away and we tried the long distance thing for a while. I figured I'd get booked enough in PA that I could pop up once in a while to see her. Ideally this would be short term and eventually we would get a place together. Then we got into instant messenger. And every night she would lay her life's problem's at my feet and ask me to fix them. And I did try. I tried for the better part of a year. But there is such a thing as compassion fatigue. And I found myself identifying and caring less and less about this person I once adored. And April is no dope, she could feel it too. And she suggested that we end things, I all too willingly agreed. It hurt a little but we had both known this day was coming. A month later we talk again and it turns out we miss each other. I suggest getting back together and tearfully we discuss it. What comes up in the "So what have you been up to" conversation is that in the space of a month she has had four one night stands with four different guys. (I know how dare I write this, this is no one's business, keep reading) And I tell her, "I dont want to be in a long distance relationship with someone that is that cavalier about casual sex". After that she got ugly. You would have thought that I just murdered her children. She calls me everyname under the sun and a few from the sun's superheated helium core. She hangs up in a huff and that's pretty much where the bitterness began. The beauty of soapbox is that this date is preserved forever in one of April's September blogs entitled "Big Stride's At Belly Laughs" she makes a point of of thanking everyone whoever helped her in her comedy career. She even goes so far as to thank Johnny Millwater a comic she never would have met if I didn't land her a guest spot on one of my booked shows. But there is no mention of me in her blog. You see I do or did appear in lots of her blogs at one time. For the better art of a year in fact her accounting of me bordered on mythical. I the Prometeus delivering the fire of how construct jokes to her meager mortaldom. She even endorsed a comedy class I was trying to teach. You can remember that because Josh Homer gave us both shit about it. I'm not trying to establish a who dumped who here. She dumped me, that's fine. What I'm trying to get at is that there is no middle ground with April. (anyone who knows her in real life, please back me up here). If you've seen the train wreck she is after she's done a bad show. Or watched her force vomit out of her already skeletal frame, you know that she is a person on the edge. And its either hot or cold, black or white. I have to be honest I am a little frightened of her these days. I forgave April because she is young, because she is sick, and because at one time I loved her very much. But the things she has written about me on Dailycomedy are SO hateful and filled with venom I feel I wouldn't be able to look at myself in the mirror if I didn't retaliate. I never claimed to be a saint. So what kind of woman is April Brucker? Well lets look at her writing shall we? Here's a snippet of a "bit" she did on Dailycomedy.com. "F is for fuck you and your retarded mother. Well, Ill leave mom out of this but there is no way in hell I was eloping and moving into the trailor with the both of you. " What she was referring to. My mother suffered mild brain damage at birth. She was given too much oxygen and almost went blind in one eye. I told April this because sometimes it gets very hard for me to deal with. It is probably my biggest personal demon to be raised by someone with this affliction. We all have something shitty in our childhood that makes us seek out the approval of others on a stage. that was mine. So what does she do? She makes it fodder for her ill-conceived "Break up Alphabet". Thanks April. For most of our relationship I saved our Email corospondences in case (God's honest truth) April became such a danger to herself or someone else that she needed to be institutionalized. I figured anyone looking at these would be able to see the depth of her problems. Here is one from January 1st 2006. STARTS HERE "I decided there is not a reonsiliation possible here. You made your choice. He who is disloyal in small things is disloyal in big things as well. Fuck as you please. I am so sorry I ever let you fuck me. I am sorry I ever let you into my life. I have truly put up with a lot from you. From you pushing me sexually, to you demeaning me in front of other comedians, to breaking glass in my room, making me go through a pregnancy scare, going behind my back to talk to Tiffany because you are such a fucking liar, and now this. I tried to be the perfect girl for you but it could never work. Besides, you are so nonchalant about it that it is sickening. I can't trust you and the speed you are going it is only going to get worse. You can only hurt people. That is all you can do. How did it feel to knock up that 19 year old? Pretty fucking sweet I bet. Because I am right about guys. You are all fucking terribly,lying, horny, always boardering on raping whatever walks pieces of shit. How did it feel to fuck everything? Pretty good.I bet you miss that. After all you fucked that pregant woman. And you are the last one that should be saying my parents are bad parents. Look at how you turned out. You may be a good comedian but that is about it. You have used every girl you have been with. Now it is my turn I guess. And I was starting to trust you. I made a mistake. Have fun fucking all things wet. And as for your business, how did she feel? Did she scream when it went in? Don't answer that. This is nasty but you have hurt me so terribly. I don;t think I can ever recover." ME AGAIN: Abusive enough for you? We were dating only 3 months and she was bringing up horrible things from my past and throwing them in my face. We stayed together for another six months. This blog was in response to me saying that I wrote jokes for her on my comedysoapbox profile. I used to get one like it once a week. I have dozens of these. What is the point of this? I am terrified that April is pouring poison into the ear of everyone around her. So much of this business is word of mouth and I want to be known as the guy I am, not some woman destr
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