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"Anything is possible. Except for the impossible."
Male
Registered on: 03/04/07
Location:
San Francisco, CA
URL: http://www.dailycomedy.com/u/DannyDechi
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Biography:
Danny Dechi's stand-up comedy has been described as "Woody Allen doing vaudeville". His humor, most often directed at himself, is a quirky combination of clean comedy & a unique #2 pencil musical act.
www.DanielDechi.com
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Page Views: 1022
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Jokes: 7
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Videos: 2
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Comments: 0
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Fans: 3
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One of the primary goals of the United States has always been to take the path of progress, and to strive for a better world. So I guess that means George W. Bush has been the banana peel in our nation's journey.
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My neighbor invited himself into my home, and started eating all of my food, playing with my TV, building things with my tools, and bringing his buddies over for late night poker games. He invaded my home, messed it all up, and he knows that I can’t do anything about it because he works for the phone company. Damn, I hate that Immunity Bill!
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Florida congressman teams with NRA, in order to sue Disney World to allow employees to bring guns to work. Maybe it’s a good idea. If Bambi’s mother had a gun, maybe she would be alive today.
An now, here’s a scene from our next episode of CSI Disney World:
COP: “Uh, Sarge. Looks like this guy got shot up pretty bad.”
SARGE: “Any leads?”
COP: “Well, witnesses say the suspect had big round ears, white gloves, and a high pitched squeaky voice.”
SARGE: “Hmm…Look around this place, Jones. It could be anybody.”
COP: “Witnesses say the suspect was yelling something about someone touching his woman.”
SARGE: “Let’s put out an APB on Donald Duck.”
COP: “But Sarge, Donald Duck doesn’t have big round ears and a high pitched squeaky voice!”
SARGE: “Exactly! It’s the old switcheroo!”
COP: “You mean…?”
SARGE: “That’s right, Jones. Slipping a Mickey.”
(Background Music) Ta, Ta, Taaa!
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On Sunday, the Pope held Mass at New York’s Yankee Stadium, and was called “out” at 2nd base. The Pope responded: “Damn, I never make it to 2nd base.”
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President Bush News Conference:
"I am here to announce today that our country is currently in a recession.
April Fools!
Just kidding. Everything's fine."
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Today, my boss praised me for doing a good job.
Then he said: “April Fools!”
Today my girlfriend said she’s not pregnant.
Then she said: “April Fools!”
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News Brief: Last night, the lunar eclipse was canceled when it was accidentally shot down by a U.S. Navy missile, whose original target was the rogue satellite.
In other news, last night there was an explosion at the downtown oxygen bar. Apparently, someone farted.
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