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Chris Quimby - Comedian (C)

Chris Quimby
 "Get out of my dreams and get into my Thermos"


Registered on: 10/09/06
Location: Brooks, ME
URL: http://www.dailycomedy.com/u/ChrisQuimby

Biography:

Chris Quimby is an award-winning standup comic and published humor columnist from Brooks, Maine.
Check out his website at chrisQuimby.com
Page Views: 263     |     Jokes: 53     |     Videos: 0     |     Comments: 0     |     Fans: 2
Latest Jokes  
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Yale A Cappella Group Assaulted on Tour

Submitted: Jan 10, 2007
Category: News  

 Group with downbeat pummeled by group with beat down.

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Amateur Comedian Writes Unique Joke

Submitted: Dec 15, 2006
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

President Bush
564 Jokes  16 Videos

    Chris Quimby, a generally unsuccessful and unpolished comic recently wrote a joke that contained no references to Mel Gibson, God, Nicole Richie, Kevin Federline, Paris Hilton, Catholic priests, Michael Richards, Britney Spears or President Bush.

    Efforts proved to be in vain, however, as the punchline contained an insult at the expense of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. 

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Man of Unknown Ethnicity Disgusted at Lack of Offensive Remarks

Submitted: Dec 15, 2006
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Rosie O'Donnell
61 Jokes

    A world citizen recently expressed outrage at the lack of hateful rhetoric directed towards his ethnicity.

    "Michael Richards blasts the black community.  Rosie O'Donnell satirizes spoken Chinese.  Do I get even one irresponsible put-down directed at my cultural heritage?  Nothing!  Sure, being made fun of is no real treat, but getting the silent treatment is a quiet, more deadly poison."

    The disgruntled 35 year old said he is seeking the help of the ACLU, which he characterized as a group of "sap sucking liberal homos."

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Gen. Pinochet Suffers Acute Heart Attack

Submitted: Dec 3, 2006
Category: News  















It was to die for.

 

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"Get Discovered" Caption Contest

Submitted: Nov 30, 2006
Category: News  











"Hey, Turkey!  Don't tell those bananas, but I screwed up the Contest Entries page on Daily Comedy!"

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Radiation Found in Dead Russian Ex-Spy

Submitted: Nov 29, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Russia
103 Jokes  1 Videos















Reportedly for peaceful, energy purposes.

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Ahmadinejad Writes Letter to Americans

Submitted: Nov 29, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!















Ignores Spell Check warning on his last name. 

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Pope Says Turkey is Religious Bridge

Submitted: Nov 28, 2006
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Pope
103 Jokes  1 Videos















Also, stuffing is economic reform and crackers are still the Body of Christ.

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N.Y. Police Kill Groom Near Strip Club

Submitted: Nov 25, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Stripper
74 Jokes  1 Videos

 










Al Qaida claims responsibility.

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Buddhist Monk Cuts Off Own Penis, Refuses Reattachment

Submitted: Nov 24, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Dirty Mouth
1847 Jokes  69 Videos

 Religious individual places unit under pillow, expects large payoff from the Penis Fairy, Sir Elton John.

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