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Denis Donohue
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Woman Has Amazing Memory

By: Denis Donohue (C)
Submitted: May 13, 2008
Staff Pick!

Woman Has Amazing MemoryJill Price, author of the new memoir, 'The Woman Who Can't Forget' claims to be able to remember every single detail of her life with amazing accuracy.



She also never forgets to eat.


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bix brillo
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britney and the kids

By: bix brillo (C)
Submitted: May 13, 2008
Staff Pick!

...britney spears will get to spend more time with her children, according to a california judge...the judge has decreed that britney is getting her life back on track and deserves to spend more time with her kids...the children immediately filed a counter-suit asking the judge, "Why are you punishing us? We didnt do anything."

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Jerry Wolski
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Be careful what you ask for

By: Jerry Wolski (C)
Submitted: May 13, 2008

Country music legend Eddy Arnold, a pioneer of "The Nashville Sound" with songs like "Make the World Go Away" finally got his wish and passed away last week at the age of 89.

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Jerry Wolski
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MYBAD.COM

By: Jerry Wolski (C)
Submitted: May 13, 2008

The Catholic Church plans to develop a new social networking website devoted to bringing Catholics of all ages closer together. The new site replaces the old one commonly known as the National Sex Offender Registry.

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Steve Knowles
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Man Ticketed For Wearing Speedo On Beach

By: Steve Knowles (C)
Submitted: May 12, 2008

Just be glad is wasn't Rosie Odonnell being ticketed for wearing a string bikini.

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Kirk
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Family Of 20 In Little Rock!

By: Kirk  (C)
Submitted: May 10, 2008

As you can imagine, with 17 children and an 18th on the way, Mothers Day is the biggest Holiday of the year in the Jim Bob and Michele Duggar family of Little Rock, Arkansa. And this year’s is going to be bigger than ever. Since the discovery ONLY DAYS AGO that Michelle Duggan’s vigina had actually become the Holland Tunnel the family has been in a whirlwind of activity.
“Anyone with any knowledge of the human anatomy would know that you could drive a Mack Truck through there by now.” said Jim Bob Duggar the proud father. He was right because many did. DeBeers Diamond Mining Company, The Alaska Pipeline Corporation of Alaska and a privately funded particle accelerator in Texas were just a few of the interested parties the Duggars had contractual talks with. But in the end it was the Port Authority of New York that won the cavity. “Yes, when we heard of the phenomenal birth volume of this woman we saw a mutual opportunity to reduce maintence expences to New Yorkers and provide the Dugans a little income." Said Captain Barko Lounger. When ask about this maintenance issue Jim Bob responded, “ I have that under hand. I do have to fuck her in the ass just to get any kind of nut, but we can get it in at the last second a few times a year. We are planning to take the family to the city this summer and with the money we will save if the proposed new per passenger toll goes through,,,well,,,we will have beat the game right there. It’s worth the sacrifice.”

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Keith Alberstadt
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Myanmar Aid

By: Keith Alberstadt (C)
Submitted: May 9, 2008
Staff Pick!

It is being reported that Myanmar is finally accepting help in the face of massive carnage. In other news, Amy Winehouse apparently changed her name to Myanmar.

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Alex Fossella
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"Aid on the way to Myanmar, but so is heavy rain"

By: Alex Fossella (C)
Submitted: May 9, 2008

Snap!

This and other put-downs available in the new edition of "The Internet Snaps on Tragedy."

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Keith Alberstadt
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Construction Heist

By: Keith Alberstadt (C)
Submitted: May 9, 2008

More and more thieves are stealing construction equipment. Police became suspicious when Priscilla Presley reported her make-up kit was missing.

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Alan Kaye
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2008 Summer Olympics

By: Alan Kaye (C)
Submitted: May 7, 2008
Staff Pick!

I see the Olympic Torch has finally arrived in China for the summer games. Which is ironic, because it was probably made there in the first place!

They could've just kept it there & saved a lot of gas money.

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