A new study from the New England Research Institute has found a substantial drop in testosterone amongst American men over the last two decades.

Dr. Thomas Travison said it is likely that, "Some sort of external exposure is responsible for the testosterone decline," but said the reason for the precipitous drop in modern men still remained a mystery.

"Now if you'll excuse me," said Dr. Travison, "I've got to get home by 8 p.m. or my wife will kill me."