British scientists have applied for a patent to create a hybrid embryo of a human and a cow. The embryo would be used for stem cell research before being released to shop for a flat screen TV at Wal-Mart.

Wal-Mart is offering an employee discount on all caskets--good news for Wal-Mart greeters.   

A Florida couple is in the news for getting married in a Wal-Mart where they met. ***MARLAR: When you get such a great markdown on spouses, you gotta jump on it!

Wal-Mart has announced plans to build a Super Center in Locust Grave, VA near a 145 year old Civil War battle field. The company also announced plans to hire that wars veterans as door greeters.

 If you play President Obama's speech to school children backwards you can actually hear him say "Paul is playing Beatles Rock Band at Wal-Mart go buy it"

 Here's the deal.  I call this my Jesus Remix.  It's 2 jokes... same set up, but 2 different punchlines.  Here we go....

So I was driving down the road the other day and saw this guy holding up a sign that said, "Jesus Saves!"  And I couldn't help but think to myself, "Man, Wal Mart's got some stiff competition!"

REMIX

So I was driving down the road the other day and saw this guy holding up a sign that said, "Jesus Saves!" Which reminded me how much of a Jew he truly is!

Walmart is now selling it's own line of coffins.So you can be buried in debt,below Aisle 4. 

Coincidentally, a new Chinese poll reveals that Wal-Mart also best symbolizes China since most of  Wal-Mart's merchandise is made there.

In addition to buying your groceries, shampoo and cleaning supplies at Wal-Mart, you can add another discounted item to your list: A casket. Yes, Wal-Mart has started selling caskets at prices that undercut most funeral homes. However, Wal-Mart's caskets are only available online from the company's web site. The selection of 15 caskets and dozens of urns ranges in price from $999 to $3,199. Most are under $2,000.  ***MARLAR: Wal-Mart actually created demand for caskets after so many of their customers were killed by the falling prices.

Tourists in Amsterdam who want to see some of the expensive diamonds and gems the city is known for will no longer have to visit a museum or a diamond house. The city's biggest department store now has around $1.5 million worth of jewelry on display in its front window.  ***MARLAR: Wal-Mart has had a clear-glass display for its fine jewelry for years. It's called a gumball machine.

Walmart has announced that it will aggressively expand its $10 toy program for the 2009 holiday season. Last year the program applied to a total of ten toys, and this year they say it will apply to over 100 toys.   ***MARLAR: In other words, they could’ve afforded to give you a break last year, but decided to stick it to you instead?