The Russian submarines cruising off the U.S. east coast are looking for the best deal in the "Cash for Clunkers' program.

Ticket prices.

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Regular Seating Prices= Man-Portable Surface-To-Air Missile Systems

Balcony Seating Prices= Laser Weapon Systems

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Levi Johnston is well-endowed.  In fact,  last month Johnston visited Russia and Sarah Palin could see his penis from her house.

MOSCOW – U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton's meeting with Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov was going well until Clinton gazed over his shoulder and proclaimed,  "Hey, you can see Sarah Palin's house from here!".

Sarah Palin is publishing her memoirs entitled "Going Rogue." It contains a special section with color by numbers pages in the back, featuring Russia and her house.

Russia claims to have the "dad of all bombs." This bomb is said to be as destructive as a nuke but without the radiation, so it's "environmentally-friendly."  ***MARLAR: Because when you're decimating everything for miles around, you don't want to harm the environment.

The daring Somali pirates are now hijacking ships a long way from their home base.  In fact, today the pirates attempted to seize a Russian cargo ship delivering supplies to the International Space Station.  

President Obama's decision to scrap former President George W. Bush's plans for a missile defense shield in Eastern Europe came under harsh criticism from some members of Congress who, invoking Cold War memories, warned that the move would "empower" Russia. Apparently, President Obama never saw the movie “Red Dawn.”

Russia overcame the Czech Republic to win hockey's four-nation Karjala Cup. If you already knew this, get help for your gambling problem.

Cuba is trying to rekindle its relationship with Russia.The government is hoping to get some Cubans involved in the Russian space program.If all goes well,they will explore the final frontier as Castronauts.