The outcry of "Save the Wienermobiles!" has even touched the hearts of the porn industry.

Yesterday they donated a dozen of John Holmes' condoms to be used as car covers.

Bravo!!

The legendary meat-processor's cause of death has a first name it's H-E-A-R-T.   His cause of death has a second name it's A-T-T-A-C-K.  

Oscar Mayer is the only person in history to have his famous wiener eaten more times than John Holmes.

It seems the young woman that crashed the wienermobile into a house, was very inexperienced at handling such massive objects..

So to avoid another such accident Oscar Mayer has brought in a consultant/ advisor. A certified expert with 25+ years in large wiener know-how and handling...Heidi Fleiss.

 The man behind the famous brand died last week at age 95. Oddly though he was buried with his head and feet outside the coffin. The family stated that this was because he was bun length.

The famed Oscar Mayer Wienermobile crashed into a house in Milwaukee last week.

The bad news is the Wienermobile went into the house, penetrating through the garage, the good news is the garage was incredibly stimulated. 

There are seven wienermobiles in existence, which makes it GM's top-selling vehicle

An Oscar Meyer Wienermobile plowed into the front of a home in Racine, WI. Friday causing damage to both the home and vehicle. The driver was charged  with "driving onion the influence" and "leaving the scene of a condiment".

www.jerrywolski.com

The Oscar Mayer Wienermobile crashed into a house in Wisconsin.It appears that the Wiener got the wurst of the incident. 

I think self-esteem is important for kids, and I had my dreams crushed early by a guidance consular who told me that my dream was unrealistic and that I would never be able to actually become what I really wanted to be – an Oscar Meyer Wiener, due to my poor test scores and OSHA  and FDA regulations.
It’s too late for me, but I’ve come up with an idea to help the next generations with their self esteem.

I think it’s the law that when you have a kid you have to name it.  If it’s not a law,  it’s at least a tradition and it makes claiming them as dependents much easier.

But I think it would be good for parents not to tell their children what their name really is until they’re twenty one years old. That way kids could always hope that they might actually be someone famous.  Are you going to be nervous trying out for basketball if you think there is an outside shot that you might actually be Michael Jordon? Hell, no. You might already have hundreds of millions of dollars in shoe endorsements deals already as  far as you know.

 How embarrassing would it be to flunk science if you turn out to be Steven Hawking?  Very embarrassing, so they’ll study more because they don’t want to chance it.

 Is a child going to be a skinhead or a neo-nazi  if they think they might learn when they’re 21 that they were really  Malcolm X all along?

You could also use it to influence their  behavior. “Oh, you don’t floss….By the way I read in the paper that Osama Bin Laden doesn’t floss, but that’s probably just a coincidence”.

Of course when they turn 21 and find out that they really are just someone no one (including themselves) have ever heard of, they’ll be pissed off, but they probably should be out of the house by then anyway. 

 The homeowner, however, said he was thankful that "My insurance has a first name. It's S-t-a-t-e. My insurance has a last name. It's F-a-r-m."