According to MSNBC, a beagle that had been rescued from a rooftop after hurricane Katrina was shot to death last month for growling at a man through a fence. Apparently a man with a gun felt threatened by the beagle. The man said he experienced a similar kind of rage while watching Sesame Street.

Rush Limbaugh has challenged MSNBC to go thirty days without mentioning his name.  MSNBC responded by challenging Rush to go thirty days without visiting a Krispy Kreme store.

MSNBC's Contessa Brewer has apologized for mixing up civil rights activists Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.   Unfortunately, this isnt the first time such a mix up has occurred   Last month Barack Obama was in the MSNBC studio and Brewer asked him to pick up her dry cleaning. 

Big socialist rally at a stadium on Berkley Campus.  The crowd is huge. Attendees are hippie throwbacks, Berkley liberals, every pervert imaginable, all of Hollywood, and of course MSNBC.  Two Greek columns on the stage.  The crowd is waiting in anticipation.  Suddenly, the lightning strikes; the entire place fills with smoke; sparks are everywhere.  Out of nowhere, above the crowd, appears a giant, ghostly figure.  Floating above the stadium, the figure begins to talk, in a booming, rolling voice:

"I have bestowed a new doctrine upon thee!"
"Thou shall worship me and no other!"
"Thou shall covet thy neighbor's wealth, and thou shall enforce the mandatory tithing upon thy neighbor to the higher authority. The higher authority shall distribute thy and thy neighbor's wealth with wisdom!"
"Thou shall not succumb to the false temptation of profit!"
"Thou shall only abort thy first-born no later that the twelfth month after conception!"
"Thou shall bow down to my apostles Karl Marx, Fidel Castro, Che Guevara, and Vladimir Lenin!"

One of the throwback hippies, elbow nudges Cris Mathews and asks,
"Is this.....  Is this......"
Chris Mathews replies, "No - that's only God.  Sometimes he thinks he's Barack Obama!"

Recently on MSNBC, Levi Johnston commented on the recent travails of Sarah Palin, saying the fame of the presidential election "got to her head," and if she ran for president, he would not vote for her.

I'm not one to defend Palin by a long shot, but Levi...dude...y'sure you wanna speak out that much about a woman who's clearly unstable, is a stone's throw away from menopause and already enjoys shooting things from helicopters?

 Former pro wrestler and Minnesota governor Jesse Ventura will be working on a new conspiracy-theory series for truTV.   Previously, Ventura hosted a weekly talk show on MSNBC that lasted just two months.  Ventura blamed cancellation of the show on TV executives who conspired against him.

Barack Obama was so pleased with the response to his half-hour TV  message last night he is considering forming an Obama cable network--oh wait , there already is one, MSNBC.

Actually, nobody knows, not even the major banks who are lending the money.

"We've lent some of it. We've not lent some of it. We've not given any accounting of, 'Here's how we're doing it,'" said Thomas Kelly, a spokesman for JPMorgan Chase, which received $25 billion in emergency bailout money. "We have not disclosed that to the public. We're declining to."

Kelly, however, did not mention in the MSNBC reports that if another bail-out is needed soon, banks and automakers will not be hesitant to ask for another astronomically high dollar amount, almost in rote.

- As the pundit would editorialize here, boys, "How many sets of books are these guys using, and when they cook the books, are they going to do it stove-top style or by microwave?

President Barack Obama, expressing his openness to a newspaper bailout bill, stated that good journalism is “critical to the health of our democracy."

Insiders report  that the proposal would allow ABC, NBC, CBS, MSNBC, CNN, NPR, L. A. Times, New York Times, Boston Globe, Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, San Francisco Chronicle, Newsweek and Time Magazine to copy news stories from FOX NEWS in support of said “good journalism.”