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Mark Jabo
Mark Jabo




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I am a stand-up comic, sit-down writer and semi-reclining producer. I split my time between New York, Maryland and Florida. Recently co-authored a book, "The Sky is Falling! A Global Warming Survival Guide."Time Magazine's Person of the Year, 2006\Find me doing something at:www.comedyblockparty.comwww.markjabo.comwww.getmehot.blogspot.comwww.pointsincase.com/writers/mark_jabo.htm\\\
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Mark Jabo
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Little Miss Sunshine

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 21, 2006
Category: Sports  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Phoenix Suns

29 Jokes  1 Videos


 

Party photos of another Miss America contestant have surfaced.  The pictures reportedly show Katie Rees (Miss Nevada 2007) exposing her breasts, passionately kissing other young women, and simulating oral sex with females and a male.

Earlier this month, Rees was the guest of honor at a Special Olympics bowling tournament and last month attended an event for underprivileged children.


Tickets are sold out for Miss Nevada's upcoming charity appearance at the Make-A-Wish foundation.


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P.C., Richer

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Jan 25, 2007
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Congress

246 Jokes  2 Videos











Among the many changes instituted by the new Democrat majority in Congress is how they refer to new Senators.  Party leaders say they will no longer use the "derogatory" term "freshman" to describe first-term Senators.

Instead, in an effort to be more politically correct, newly-elected officials will henceforth be referred to as "not yet corrupt."

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Go...Go, Virgil...Go, Go

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 22, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Immigration

49 Jokes  1 Videos

Congressman Virgil Goode (R-Idiot-VA) sent out a letter to constituents that unless immigration is tightened, "many more Muslims" will be elected and will use the Koran at their ceremonial swearing-in.

Congressmen should be free to swear-in on books that reflect their deeply held beliefs.  As a result, incoming representatives will now have their choice of swearing in on either the Bible, the Koran or a stack of back issues of Barely Legal.

You can tell Congessman Goode is an experienced politician.  He was able to execute the difficult political maneuver of trashing both open immigration and religious freedom in one letter - a feat that earned him a 9.75 from the international panel of judges (after you throw out North Korea's high score of a perfect 10.0). 

Memo to Congressman Goode: Last time we checked it's called The Statue of Liberty, not The Statue of Circumscribed Freedoms.




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Indiana Wants Me

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 7, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Latoya Jackson

7 Jokes


Erik Estrada, LaToya Jackson and Ozzie Osbourne's son, Jack have been sworn in as reserve officers of the Muncie, Indiana police department, allowing them to carry badges and guns as part of a new reality television series, Armed and Famous.

Network executives settled on the show's title after rejecting the more cumbersome, Armed and Looks Vaguely Familiar.

The show is already mired in controversy as the Muncie Police Department faces a copyright infringement lawsuit from the producers of Reno 911.

In New York City, Port Authority officials scrambled to add more buses on the New York-to-Muncie route to accommodate the needs of parolees, career criminals and civil attorneys.*

Plans are already in the works for a spin-off show in which high school students are given guns and a license to hunt down D-list celebrities to fulfill their school's community service requirement.

   



*Categories not mutually exclusive


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Safe Sex in the City

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Jan 15, 2007
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

New York City

332 Jokes  42 Videos

 











Mayor Bloomberg is scheduled to take the wraps off the city's own "NYC" brand of free condoms.

The only catch is users will have to go outside to smoke afterwards.

The city-branded condoms will come in packets with a variety of colors representing the different subway lines.  Because nothing says sexy like the New York City subway system.

New euphemism for sex:  Taking the F-train to Brooklyn.

Women in all five boroughs are already bracing themselves for the latest line from their partners:  "Hey, baby, there's another train coming right behind this one."



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Hollywood Swingin'

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 5, 2006
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Gwen Stefani

5 Jokes




Gwen Stefani and her hairdresser use her appearance at the Billboard Music Awards to pay tribute to tsunami victims.



 


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We Need More Red Bull

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 7, 2006
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Iraq

411 Jokes  3 Videos

 


The long-awaited report from the Iraq Study Group was released yesterday.  The group came out with 79 separate recommendations including talking with Iran, getting the U.N. more involved and, in the event you weren't sure of a correct answer, trying to eliminate obvious wrong answers and then just guessing.




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Northern Iraq Exposure

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Jan 12, 2007
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Iraq

411 Jokes  3 Videos


 










An Air Force staff sergeant who posed nude for Playboy magazine has been relieved of her duties while the military investigates.

Meanwhile, 21,500 other troops will be exposed over the next year.


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Sealing the Deal

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 14, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

San Francisco

78 Jokes  2 Videos

 



New study reports "male seals are reaping the benefits of climate change by having more sex."






Scientists also noted a 67% increase in headaches among female seals and a growing sense of exasperation in dealing with more frequent requests to "do that thing where you balance my balls on your nose."

In other news...
Facing falling domestic sales, Hummer announced plans to target new markets.  The company will position the H2 as a "mammal magnet" and will be making automatic transmission standard on its new 2007 models.

At Fisherman's Wharf in San Francisco, a female seal recently filed a complaint against members of the visiting Duke lacrosse team.


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Where's My Cheese?

By: Mark Jabo (C)
Submitted: Dec 6, 2006
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Halle Berry

12 Jokes

 



New study shows cats can develop Alzheimer's. 

Scientists suspected a link when they moved a scratching post and found three years worth of New York Times and old bingo cards hidden behind it.

Lifetime network plans made-for-TV movie starring Julie Newmar.



 

 
Disease could affect over 87% of Broadway actors.










Oscar winner, Halle Berry said to have tested negative since she can't forget Catwoman no matter how hard she tries.










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