Bulimics are thanking Britney Spears for giving them a legitimate reason to vomit.

According to a USA Today poll, nearly every civilized nation with sensible gun restriction laws has an annual murder rate with guns lower than the USA. America has 15 thousand murders, yet we’re still glad we’re not France.

Education Secretary Margaret Spellings says she studied hard to prepare for her appearance on Celebrity Jeopardy! She came in second stating her excuses for not winning, “I didn't realize how much skill went into hitting the buzzer at just the right moment. I often hit it too early and didn't get picked to tackle a catagory."

"And the dog ate my homework."

China’s communist party leaders promised to do more to close the country’s growing gap between their rich and poor....right after they finish construction on their golden jeweled palaces.

The finger pointing continues in Washington when reporters asked who let Kim Jong Il get the bomb? Now, were they talking Nukes or did someone send North Korea a copy of Gigli?

Bank of America stunned online Brokerage firms last week by offering free trades to anyone who has $25,000 or more in an account at their bank.  Then Zeco.com topped that by offering free trades to anyone with $2,500 in an account.  The best offer was from Mark Foley, offering free trades to anyone with 25cents in their piggy bank account

A new toothbrush is available that plays pop music like; Rocky’s theme song, We will rock you, by Queen, & Let’s get it started by Black Eyed Peas.  No comment from Niggaz with Attitude for their rejected song, She Swallowed It

The latest advance in bomb-sniffing technology relies on simple devices - honeybees.

"Honeybees are as good as dogs," entomologist Timothy Haartmann of Los Alamos (N.M.) National Laboratory says. "The trick, it turns out, is training the little critters to detect bomb scents...

and getting them to fetch a pair of slippers.