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Todd Justice
Todd Justice
"Leave it alone, or make it worse?"

Fort Worth, TX

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Biography
Standup comedian from the great state of Texas who can be heard on both XM and Sirius Satellite Radio around the world. He has performed all over the US, Canada, Europe, Middle East, Asia, and has even appeared on "Family Feud"!
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Joke List: Most Views (From All Time)

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Todd Justice
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 Facebook Cum Laude

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: May 8, 2009
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Facebook
49 Jokes  41 Videos

Facebook Cum Laude

 A new study published this week, states that Facebook use and lower grades in school are "likely unrelated". Of course ...

- With Instant Messaging, how could you fail a test?

- Unrelated ... like unemployment and pregnancy.

- They have an app that does homework for you.


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Todd Justice
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 Quit Bragging

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Jul 11, 2009
Category: Sports  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

San Francisco
78 Jokes  2 Videos

Quit Bragging

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) — San Francisco Giant Jonathan Sanchez pitched the first no-hitter of 2009 on friday night, beating the Allen High School Badgers 29-0.

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Todd Justice
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 The Wild, Wild West

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 5, 2006
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

School
933 Jokes  35 Videos

MADISON, Wis. (AP) — A state lawmaker, worried about a recent string of deadly school shootings, suggested arming teachers, principals and other school personnel as a safety measure and a deterrent.
 
In other news, Bessie the cow has disappeared out of old man Jacobs' barn.

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 A New Genre

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 29, 2007
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Porn
198 Jokes  9 Videos

The 'Saw' movie series has recently been described by some as "torture porn." These same viewers have clearly never seen a Ron Jeremy flick.

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Todd Justice
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 Hush little baby, don't you cry

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 5, 2006
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Amish
18 Jokes

Two family members of the man who shot 10 girls in an Amish schoolhouse say they have no recollection that he molested them 20 years ago.
 
"Nothing happened, go away."

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Todd Justice
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 No more prison porn

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 17, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Prison
589 Jokes  3 Videos

EVANSVILLE, Ind. - Revealing tops are out and bras are now a must for women visiting prisoners at the Vanderburgh County Jail. Jail officials imposed a new dress code policy after several incidents in which women visiting the jail exposed themselves to male prisoners.

One official made it very clear ... "If I can't see 'em, nobody sees 'em."

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 We Need A Sample

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Jul 28, 2008
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Space
277 Jokes  3 Videos

The Mars Lander had trouble today delivering a sample for analysis.

See there, it's not just me!

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 Nutcracker

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 28, 2007
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

New York
1180 Jokes  34 Videos

According to researchers at the Mount Sinai School of Medicine in New York, peanut allergies cause 50 to 100 deaths per year. Someone ought to shut that place down.

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Todd Justice
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 Mel Gibsons' vision blurred

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 4, 2006
Category: Entertainment  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Mel Gibson
134 Jokes  4 Videos

"I think I've got a Jew in my eye."

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Todd Justice
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 Kinky on abortion

By: Todd Justice (C)
Submitted: Oct 5, 2006
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Birth Control
369 Jokes  9 Videos

Kinky Friedman stated recently that abortion should be "very, very rare", and only if you're pregnant.

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