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WWW.VERBALCARTOONIST.COM is NOW UP AND RUNNING and voted BEST NEW COMEDY SITE.
Five days ago we hit 1,000 VISITS a day. Today I am at just under 1,400 individual visits a day. Find out Why.

Just recently came out with my book 'DISCONTINUED SOUP' Available through Barnes & Noble etc have done several years of stand up in NYC and the Midwest.

I have a weekly feature (Dan Liebert, Verbal Cartoonist) on www.mcsweeneys.net/links/danliebert. Also I have recorded weekly bits for national NPR's 'Fair Game' show.

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Lucy Logsdon (Guest) says:

Your stuff is hilarious. I found it because I read via Illinois Arts Council newsletter that a poetry recipient from Elizabethtown had won---and I found this David Sedaris--like stuff instead. Are you really living in the Elizabethtown in Southern Illinois--on the Ohio River? That's crazy!...

Beth Schumann says:

I'm sorry. I know I'm a total snot. I didn't think you stole my joke, I know that lots of people can come up with similar ideas. I was just having a bad day, a fight with my husband, etc. etc. I shouldn't have taken it out on you, sorry. Of course your joke is hilarious, because great minds think...

Ray Ellin says:

so funny... all of it.

Octavia Smith says:

I'm so loving this page.keep it coming.

Dan Liebert says:

Thanks Ray, I've enjoyed you many times from the balcony at the Strip. If you see DF tell him hello and be sure to let him know you like my stuff - he taught me.

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Joke Cloud (Popular Tags)

Joke List: Highest Rated (From All Time)

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82 Jokes  

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Iran is Marlboro Country By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 30, 2007 Category: News  Staff Pick!

From Hot Topic Iran 176 Jokes

Iran has banned the word 'women' on Iranian TV - all references to 'women's' issues' or 'women's groups' will be changed to 'family'. First we're told there's no gays in Iran and now there's no women. That leaves men and little boys. Hmmmm. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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Generic Margarine By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Dec 8, 2007 Category: Weird

I bought generic margarine and it was just as good as the name brand. I can't believe it's not I can't believe it's not butter. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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USED SEX DOLL By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Sep 12, 2007 Category: Weird  Staff Pick!

I bought a used sex doll. Its not that I'm cheap I just like a woman with experience. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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Condom In The Woods By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 6, 2007 Category: Sports  Staff Pick!

From Hot Topic Birth Control 369 Jokes  9 Videos

The most embarrassing thing I ever did. In third grade I found a used condom in the woods and brought it to school for show-and-tell: "Every year about this time, the snakes shed their skins...." Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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Very Un-Green of You By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 14, 2007 Category: Weird

It's very 'un-green' of you to speak of shark infested waters. They belong in the water - we don't Its like talking about a child-infested playground. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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SLEEP SYSTEM By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Oct 23, 2007 Category: Weird

'Window Treatments' I'm OK with. But calling a bed a 'Sleep System'??? A 'Sleep System' is two valium and a shot of Jack Daniels. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it:

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Home Schooling By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 19, 2007 Category: Weird

From Hot Topic School 933 Jokes  35 Videos

My brother and his family live way the hell out in the Ozarks and they're homeschooling their kids. My little nephew Eric came up to me and said, "Guess what, Uncle Danny, this year I got straight A's!" "Gee, that's great Eric but I'm not surprised, I mean your dad IS banging the teacher." Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (3)  |  Rate it:

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Whipping Old Ladies By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 29, 2007 Category: News

From Hot Topic Sudan 22 Jokes

A British teacher in Sudan who looks like everyone's grandma is in danger of being whipped to death for inadvertently letting a little boy name a teddy bear 'Mohammed'. It is considered an insult to 'Islam'. How can you insult a 'religion' that whips grandmas to death for inadvertently naming teddy bears? Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (2)  |  Rate it:

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Condom In The Woods By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Nov 6, 2007 Category: Sports

From Hot Topic Birth Control 369 Jokes  9 Videos

The most embarrassing thing I ever did. In third grade I found a used condom in the woods and brought it to school for show-and-tell: "Every year about this time, the snakes shed their skins...." Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (2)  |  Rate it:

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Saudi Olympic Team By: Dan Liebert (C) Submitted: Dec 7, 2007 Category: Sports

From Hot Topic Olympics 212 Jokes  3 Videos

In an unprecedented tragedy, Saudi Arabia lost its entire synchronized swimming team. On their first day of practice they all drowned in their burkhas. Facebook  MySpace  Twitter  Email          |  Comments (1)  |  Rate it: