It's hard being American Indian and gay.

Everytime I dance to house music, it rains. 

I work at a Mexican restaurant and tommorrow is Cinco De Mayo.  I told my co-worker that we're going to be really busy and he said they're going to be even busier in Mexico.  I said, "why is that, because Cinco De Mayo is a National Holiday in Mexico" ,  and he said, "no, because of the Swine Flu"  . 

One of my straight guy friends said he didn't want to have sex with me because he said he's not gay.

I said, "I don't care if you're gay or straight, at the end of the day it's all going to the same place"  .

I'm so broke yesterday somebody broke into my used car and didn't steal shit, they just left a note on my steering wheel that said, "My Bad"  . 

They were even nice enough to lock my car doors.

Whose there?

Corny!

Corny who?

Me so Corny !!! 

Gays can be so catty.  I have this gay friend who likes to pick out my flaws and he said, "how come your left eye is always red"  ?

I looked at him and said, "because, that's my cum eye"  . 

I hate metrosexuals because they're always trying to rip off all our shit and take all the credit.  I saw this one metrosexual wearing this really cute scarf and said, "do you know what go really cute with that scarf, a dick in your ass"  .

I hate metrosexuals, those fake faggots.

I miss being called a faggot when it meant something.