Toyota announced that they are introducing a new sportscar, along with a new version of the color red. The red color of a Japanese monkey’s backside. Yeah, I want to own a "Monkey Ass Red" car...and that "new car smell"...yeah, that'll really sell it! Or Smell it!

 In related news, Chrysler has also issued a nationwide recall over a leaky trunk.   A Chrysler official will contact the owner tomorrow. 

The 2011 Prius will be renamed the Priapus to give it a more macho image. It will be touted as "a small car with a big car feel."

Organizers of the "Buick Open" have assured the press that there are no hard feelings towards GM for their decision to end sponsorship, and that from now on the event will simply be referred to as the "Toyota is BIGGER than GM Open".

Toyota Motors announced today they will soon begin production of their latest hybrid design .  " We have created an entirely new car that does not run on gasoline . It is totally powered by hot air . We named it the LaToya ! " 

So apparently GM will be building Hondas and Toyotas.

Toyota will begin producing Prius hybrid hearses.Their goal is to put the "eco" in decomposing.

Fiat  Motors C.E.O. Sergio Marchionne  said in an interview today on the Nightly Business Report , " Our strategy for success is simple . We build new Fiats at the existing Chrysler plants and use names most Americans are familiar with , such as DeSoto, Volare , Omni, and Imperial .  I am quite sure our best seller in Italy, the very affordable Fiat 500 , will compete well with anything Honda or Toyota could produce . We will call it the Yugo ." 

In crash tests released Tuesday, the Insurance Institute for Highway Safety gave poor marks to the latest wave of "micro cars" like the Smart "fortwo," Honda Fit and Toyota Yaris, for their inability to handle collisions with other vehicles.

However, they did get high marks for frequent flyer eligibility.

Assemble Toyotas.