Larry Brown reportedly had been texting Allen Iverson. Brown's plan is to slowly teach Iverson to read.

Not only are teens texting while driving, now they’ll be texting while hungry.  Papa John's now accepts text-message orders for pizza.  ***MARLAR: How are they NOT going to get the orders wrong?  The orders are going to look like, “id lk 1 pprni pzz wth x chz n 2 rdrs f brdstx.”

2 airline pilots made a bad landing because they were using their laptops, and awhile ago a trolley operator caused a crash because of texting while driving. We need to wage a war on Distraction! 

A Scottish man has won recognition as the fastest human in the world when it comes to typing text messages on his cell phone.  ***MARLAR: He broke the world’s record by typing in the following phrase: "I am without a doubt the world’s most anti-social human being."

FALL CITY, Wash. (AP) - The center, called ReSTART, is somewhat ironically located near Redmond, headquarters of Microsoft and a world center of the computer industry. It opened in July and for $14,000 offers a 45-day program intended to help people wean themselves from pathological computer use, which can include obsessive use of video games, texting, Facebook, eBay, Twitter and any other time-killers brought courtesy of technology.

_____________________________

The twelve-step program features a series of online therapy sessions, interactive dialogue, and a user-created virtual therapist. 

Ad in subway:  "Our Best Cellular Phone Plan Ever!  Unlimited Texting $49/month!  (And some talk minutes, too, just in case you still do that shit.)

This study may be  flawed.  While conducting the study,  the researcher was also texting his wife and  reading his e-mail.

written by mr.j 2009 (c)

Honestly, when did mouth-breathing-barbaric-louses use the computer so
much that we make Bill Gates look like an Amish Ted Kaczynski?

Look, this pixilated intellectual prism is populated by a parade of
texting, tweeting, twittering, bulletins, blogs, blurbs, black
berries, black boards, e-mails, and g-mails.

For Christ's sake, this human collective's blindly acquisitive nature
of asinine antics has elicited the intrusive perpetuation of the term
'login' more than Paul Bunion at a Lumber Jack Convention.

Listen folks, nowadays the cyberspace-Stargate has reconfigured the
molecular structure of the basic rules of human discourse.

What I'm saying is, banality of banter flourishes like a Blue Angel
soaring through social-stratospheric-chat-fests and caroming off
intergalactic solar plexuses of vastly vacant headed vernacular.

Truth be told, acronyms have stormed the beaches of conversations
resonating from the deepest part of my skull to the pillars of
Hercules to the café at the fucking Thunder Dome okay.

Face it, sump-sucking conversations orchestrate more mouse clicks than
when Mickey tap danced while speaking Ethiopian with a pocket full of
Tic Tacs.

Today the girl was stripped of her title when it came to light that she had texted her opposition to gay marriage.

I have never trusted people who said they were “Christian.” At my high school they were the girls who wore promise rings against premarital sex but were sucking dick and taking it up the ass with the rest of the sluts under the bleachers but that didn’t count. Then the same morons would be praying around the flagpole before school and then got pissed when they were marked late for first period. From there it was the bible study at lunch. Of course they wouldn’t have been so bad except they dropped their beliefs in everything they did. And one cult…I mean Christian youth group……had their child molester looking leader wandering the cafeteria looking for fresh blood (I guess he was called a youth minister, me bad) and then of course there was the student captain appointed to help him convert other kids. So these days when I hear the words Christian or youth minister I know it is time to run for the hills.

Well fast forward to the beginning of February. I meet this nice looking piece of meat who has dark hair, piercing blue eyes like the ocean, and oh my gosh I haven’t blushed that way around a guy since meeting my ex-fiance. And much like my ex-fiance he is an Aquarius. We know each other for a few weeks and well…..one thing leads to another and we connect. Then he drops the bombshell. I am noticing a little awkwardness. That’s when he confesses to being a twenty five year old virgin. The whole thing blows my mind. He is nice, seemingly sweet, seemingly normal, doesn’t live in his parents basement. I ask him what the hell is up with that. He says he was raised very religious and that’s the only part of his belief system he kept because he wants to lose it to someone special. I asked if he had done anything else and he said he had made out with plenty of girls. What a rebel. The whole thing is such a shocker because he seems so normal for a Christian. Maybe they are not all evil people destined to ruin America. Boy was I wrong.

Mr. Virgin starts sending me dirty texts upon dirty texts. I could say hi and he would ask me if I wanted to bone. I could ask him what he was doing and he would ask if I wanted to bone. Everything kept going back to sex with this dude. And he would never respond unless I said something dirty. So after a few of these dirty texts I told him as long as he was going to lick me until I screamed name his time and place. After all if you wanna go around talking that dirty at least back yourself up. Well he informs me he is sick, doesn’t want me to catch the bug he has, and is headed downtown. Maybe some other day. Im like wait….any straight dude in the world even on his death bed is well when it comes to even the thought of a naked woman. This is the most screwed up dude ever. Man, God and Jesus have really done a number on his psyche.

So a few days pass and I am getting so sick of this dirty texting game. After all, I am a big girl. So two nights ago he was in my dream and I texted him to tell him so because despite the fact he is a moron he is still kind of hot. That’s when he asks if we boned. So now my roommate and I are looking at each other like what?!?!? I told him no because he doesn’t do that. After a few more dirty texts from him I tell him flat out his religion is fucking him up. That’s when he sends me this ranting texts about me not denigrating his beliefs. At this point I feel bad so I apologize. Then I make a joke about him sending me a naked pic because I know he wont. Then he requests a naked pic from me. That’s when my roommate and I figure it out….the virgin is using his religious beliefs as a way to get free sexual favors and free naked pictures from women. Yeah, making a home run may be against the rules but apparently this isn’t. Oh how it is interesting how those hypocrites operate.

That’s when he tells me he isn’t and all. And he says he regards me as a friend and says he embraced me for who I was. I know that is Christian bullshit. So then I inform him we aren’t friends. Then he said he hoped we could have been and that he was sorry to force his beliefs down my throat. And that’s when I told him I was glad he wouldn’t be forcing his dick down my throat either. He informed me he respected women to which I informed him sending dirty texts, soliciting sexual favors, and asking for naked pictures was not respecting women, it was denigrating women. And he was using his standing as a Christian to do it. He then tells me the night we met was not typical of him and it was too early to have this much emotion. That’s when I tell him either way I think he is a loser and I really don’t care about him as a person, but I care when people denigrate me and think that they can use me because of who they are or who they think they are. That’s when he tells me he has been nice and apologetic and I have treated him like dirt. WTF! Wait a second…that’s when I tell him he has been treating me like dirt all night and its okay because he’s a Christian. From there I tell him to go bang one of his born again ugly chicks. Seriously. Then I looked on his facebook. Turns out he went to college to be a youth minister. YUCK! But of course. And then there were several pictures of him in his native environment….church.

The kicker is he told me he has had similar experiences with women, surprise surprise. My mom tells me she is worried I am not dating, well if this is the dating pool I would much rather be single. While my friend Kathy warned me this moron would be in the same mind set that her fifteen year old son Tommy was, Tommy is more sophisticated despite this stutter at times. But one last thing, if you are twenty five and still a virgin, there is a reason for it aside from religion. Its not just your choice. Its everybody’s. Love April.