Learn the trick, dicovered by a pornstar to turn yellow teeth white for under $5.00

The Preventive Medicine Society of China reports that 60 percent of people in rural areas of the country have never brushed their teeth. ***MARLAR: Here’s the strange thing… I checked it out this morning; my toothbrush is stamped “Made in China.”     

In Coeur d'Alene, Idaho, 87-year-old Violet Bishop was watching television when she thought she'd have a snack. So she decided to dig into the Halloween candy early and picked up a box of Milk Duds. But as she started to munch she noticed one of the Milk Duds didn't seem as fresh as the others. She said, "One was rather crunchy and I could not get it to soften up, no matter how hard I tried." She finally took it out of her mouth only to discover it wasn't a Milk Dud at all. It was her hearing aid that fallen out of her ear and into the box. Fortunately there was no serious damage to the hearing aid or her teeth but it cost her about $250 to have the hearing aid cleaned and repaired. Violet later told reporters, "As much as I love my Halloween candy, I'll be sure to notice what I'm eating from now on!"  ***MARLAR: Meanwhile, she’s been fitted with a Milk Dud for an ear bud.

Associated Press: "The body of ex-model Jasmine Fiore was found Aug. 15 in a suitcase that had been dumped in a trash bin in Orange County, Calif. Fiore, 28, had been strangled. Her teeth and fingers were gone, and her body was so mutilated that investigators had to identify her though the serial number of her breast implants, prosecutors said Friday."

Me: Identified by her breast implants...sure, why should death be any different?

Smelly people and warm weather have forced a United Kingdom amusement park, to issue a warning to guests, to keep their arms down on all rides. 

The new "Say No To B.O." sign will posted below the "You Must Have All 32 Teeth To Ride This Ride" sign.

Women's boxing was added to the 2012 Olympics in London. If any British women get their teeth knocked out, we'll see if anyone notices.

British officials reacted with outrage Friday at American criticism of the country's health care system even with a 15 billion pound ($24 billion) deficit....If you want to see how well their system works, just ask a Brit to Smile!

Golfer John Daly has begun losing feeling in his hands. Luckily, he can still open beer bottles with his teeth. Daly recently posted his worst score ever in a regular PGA Tour event. His score was so high observers mistook it for his blood alcohol level.

-I read the auto-bio written by the writer of CLIFF'S NOTES.    

Chapter One: "I was born."

Chapter Two: I realized in class lectures that I have ADD and slow handwriting while taking notes.

Chapter Three: THE END!!!

-I was a pen pal with a chicken but I could never read his hand writing.

-"Employee of the month" for seasonal jobs is an award for 1/3 of your total career.

-If you think about it, it's a drive-thru parking lot…the restaurant is better described driven around…it's only drive-thru restaurants during a horrendous car collision for hungry drivers.

-I wanted writer's block so instead I write only use invisible ink, with invisible pens, but the paper is hard to miss.

-I like to put white out on paper before I write to prevent from mistakes.

-Tank tops should only be in camouflage.

"Man this fluorescent fabric was a bad choice. I better wear this shirt in across enemy lines."

-Do you think when ..Edison.. had the idea for the light bulb, a candle popped up over his head?

-I went to the doctor. All he did was make a big deal over nothing. Don't go see Dr. Amatic!

-....Columbus.... didn't like to shop. But if he did, he should have went to a store specializing in flat globes…because the customer is always right!

-I got my teeth cleaned with a spit shine!

...reality TV goes rural this fall when Bravo Television network premieres "The Real Housewives of the Appalachian Trail."  The show will feature 16 women and 32 teeth.