Get your tickets to see comedy legends MARTIN SHORT and PAUL SHAFFER live!!

Saturday February 6th at 8:30pm at the White Plains Performing Arts Center in White Plains, NY.

For GALA information call Debra at 914-242-7460 or at mkhcgala2010@yahoo.com

Ticket prices are $100 (General Admission), $180 (Premium Seating), and $1,800 (V.I.P. Cocktail Reception with the STARS from 7pm-8pm. Includes Premium Orchestra Seating).

Proceeds to benefit the Mt. Kisco Hebrew Congregation educational programs and community outreach.

10 ) Must be able to keep your mouth shut, (after sex)

9 ) Be able to work late hours after stage hands and cleaning crew go home .

8 ) Must be single, no kids, and never married .

7 ) Can not have any jealous boyfriends lurking around the studio

6 ) Prefer you have the face of Heather Locklear, the eyes of Catherine Zeta-Jones, the lips of Angelina Jolie, the fiery red hair of Angie Everhart, and the body of Cindy Margolis .

5 ) Be able to take dictation to CBS law firm while sitting on Dave's lap .

4 )  You are not allowed to wear pantyhose . Dave prefers you wear black stockings, garter belts, thong panties, and 5 inch spiked heels .  

3  Know how to do C.P.R., Letterman is no spring chicken .

2 ) Must be able to have your eyes open and keep a straight face during Dave's love-making sessions .

1 ) Stay at least 100 feet away from Paul Shaffer . He's Dave's Boy-Toy !    

A news reporter asked Paul Shaffer and many other staff  members of  The Late Show ,  " What's it like working for David Letterman ? " ..  Shaffer and about 20 other employees fired back , " It Sucks, It Really, Really Sucks ! "

Gap tooth funny man David Letterman surprised everyone yesterday by announcing on his show that he had sex with some female employees over the years .  In a related story, his long time bandleader sidekick Paul Shaffer, decided to cash in on Dave's misery .  Shaffer just wrote a kinky tell all book titled  " I Was Letterman's Baldy Bitch In Black Leather ."