Breast reductions are the most popular form of cosmetic
surgery these days – for men.While
going under the knife is always terrifying, men are proving that it takes a
pair of balls to lose a pair of breasts.
I was at a bus stop waiting for a bus when this cross-eyed boy stopped in front of me. He then started talking in sign language to another boy about the same age. As I watched theirconversation, one and then the other glanced at me. Of course, this made me wonder what they were talking about. Then I proceeded to get paranoid the way one does when people are speaking Spanish or Arabic in line at the post office.
As I considered what to do, it occurred to me that if I wanted to let them know I was on to them, I would haveto get them to read my lips. First I would have to get the attention of one of them: “Hey! Over here. Look at me!” And then I would have to speak clearly and slowly: “I-know-that-you-are-talk-ing-about-me, lit-tle fag-got!” Of course,there was the chance that neither boy could read lips, in which case they would probably give me a quizzical look, move away and continue talking, now almost certainly about me. This would drive me crazy.
Another possibility was that the boy’s eyes were crossed because he had caught dyslexia, maybe trying to read the lips of a person with crooked teeth, gold fillings and really big lips, at night. As a result, maybe he would read, “Hey! You know about me? Here I are,that little talking faggot. Look me over!” Then they would be sure to laugh at me in sign language. I wouldn’t know whether they were laughing at me, the little talking faggot or me, the little talking faggot with poor grammar. Trying to convince them that’s not what I said would only exacerbate the situation. And to make matters worse, people would get angry at me and say things like, “Hey, little talking faggot! Stop harassing the cock-eyeddeaf-mutes!”
After a while the cross-eyed boy was going on about something, and was looking away from his audience. He didn’t notice when the other boy walked away, so he continued to sign. Soon, he turned and saw that he was alone. When he continued to sign, I thought he was just finishing his sentence. But he didn’t stop. I was bewildered and looked in the direction he was facing to find his new audience. Nobody. What the fuck? Deaf people talk to themselves using sign language?
All kinds of possibilities popped into my head. For example, what happens with deaf people with acute schizophrenia?Does everybody have to wait their turn to use the hands? Or are some voices assigned to the left hand and the others to the right (with slight to moderate grammar and pronunciation problems)? And does this lead to altercations where one hand is used to shut the other up?
And if deaf people sign to talk to themselves, are they allowed to have important jobs, where it’s necessary to be able to keep a secret? I mean, could a deaf person be trusted to be a spy? And what if they sign in their sleep? The social, personal and national security implications are staggering. And what do deaf people say about deaf people who talk to themselves?
The U. S. may soon see it’s prison population drop for the first time in 40 years. The economic crisis of overcrowding has forced states to release more and more hard core prisoners.
This might also help to decrease the growth of the U.S. population.
For a priest in Northern England, the commandment “thou shalt not steal” isn’t written in stone. The Reverend told his congregation that it is okay for desperate people to shoplift, as long as they do it at large national chains and not small mom and pop stores.
I wonder how he feels about taking the 5th, “Thou shalt not kill?”
Tiger Woods wants to know what he thinks about the 6th and the 9th. If it looks good he might convert.
Ministers from the 13 contries with Tiger Populations will hold a first-ever meeting this week in Hya Hin, Thailand in preparation for a September Tiger Summit in Rusia, where Prime Minister Vladimir Putin has been championing the survival of Tiger. Nearly 40 groups like the World Bank and the Smithsonian aim to double Tiger numbers by 2020.
Wow! I didn't know Tiger had that many influencial friends. AND they are going to double his numbers by 2020? I think that's a misprint, they must mean he'll have 2020 by the end of THIS year.
The Swedish pop group ABBA is the subject of a theme park that opened in London — ABBAWORLD.
Swedish organizers say the theme park will be "a place for total interaction"
with the band...
I don't know... I'm a little skeptical of paying $40 to ride the Dancing Queen. There's some bars in Chicago where you can do it for free... and get a free drink.