Nicholas Cage has agreed to pay the IRS $14 million dollars in back taxes.

If you would like to help, please text "FUCK THE IRS" to the IRS.

The Obama dildo has become a favorite because of it's long and hard stance as well as it's ability to completely mesmerize by just looking at it.

The Rush Limbaugh dildo has failed because of the complaints about the head being way too big, leaning unrealistically far to the right and that it just spewed rhetoric!

A Somali man believed to have ties to terrorist groups was shot as he allegedly tried to enter the home of Danish political cartoonist Kurt Westergaard, who is known for his controversial depictions of the Muslim prophet Mohammad.

Details are sketchy, but apparently he was slow on the draw.

Researchers discovered that Hewlett-Packards new web cam with face recognition software cannot see black people.

Upon hearing the news, the Klan has purchased all of the remaining stock as Christmas presents for it's members.

A miracle, but no world record for little Nicholas Coke, the baby born with no brain, as he reaches his first birthday.

The record is held by Glenn Beck who has reached age 45.

 

Rapper Lil Wayne was detained by U.S. Border Patrol agents in Texas on Friday after authorities found marijuana on two of his tour buses.

They have yet to find any talent.

Danish police in Copenhagen have arrested 250 people at the Climate Change Summit.

Unfortunately, none of them were those responsible for actually conjuring up the bulls**t fairy tale scheme.

The pregnant Kourtney Kardashian mistakenly thought that her water had broken while she was out recently.

Apparently it was just her 15 minutes of fame leaking out.

Miss Annise Parker made history Saturday by being elected as Houston's first openly gay mayor.

She licked her opponent good and apparently she won't suck.

A Massachusetts grand jury has indicted a 98-year-old woman, accused of strangling her 100-year-old nursing home roommate.

They had an argument about 3 months ago, but it took her that long to reach the other bed.