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Search "Package" returned 77 Jokes
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B Manzo
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White House announces new job numbers

By: B Manzo (M)
Submitted: Oct 30, 2009
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Bailout

317 Jokes  4 Videos

According to White House numbers, the Stimulus package has created about 650,000 new jobs. In a related story, the Department of Labor announced 650,000 new hires in unemployment offices nationwide.  

 


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Gary B.
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China's growth accelerates to 8.9 percent in 3Q

By: Gary B. (C)
Submitted: Oct 22, 2009
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

China

308 Jokes  8 Videos

The growth was attributed to a massive government stimulus package.  Unfortunately, the government was ours. 


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Frank James
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AD MAN'S NOTES

By: Frank James (M)
Submitted: Oct 22, 2009
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Viagra

79 Jokes  4 Videos

   "Niagara Viagra:  The Honeymoon Package. 

   "For you, there will be no falls!" 


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Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute
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Fehr Gets $11 Mil

By: Steve Hofstetter's National Lampoon Sports Minute (C)
Submitted: Oct 21, 2009
Category: Sports  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

New York Yankees

272 Jokes

Donald Fehr is expected to get a compensation package worth over $11 million.  Fehr plans on using it to buy two Yankee tickets.


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Gene Stray
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Stimulas Bill's Advice

By: Gene Stray (C)
Submitted: Oct 17, 2009
Category: Political  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Bill Clinton

265 Jokes  8 Videos

Obama asked Bill Clinton how to advise an intern inquiring about covering his stimulas package.  Bill responded " Tell her to use a used ribbed condom!". 


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Scot Marinick
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Report On Stimulus Jobs 'Rife With Mistakes'

By: Scot Marinick (C)
Submitted: Oct 17, 2009
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Bailout

317 Jokes  4 Videos

Report On Stimulus Jobs 'Rife With Mistakes'

Stimulus package goes to hiring more firefighters, but the catch is fireman must donate their moustaches to city sweepers. City sweepers said it's better than nothing and these moustaches really work well. 


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Dan Berry
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Obama to Announce $5 Billion in Research Grants

By: Dan Berry (C)
Submitted: Sep 30, 2009
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

Barack Obama

884 Jokes  28 Videos

Obama to Announce $5 Billion in Research Grants

President Barack Obama, in an effort to stimulate the economy, is scheduled to announce $5 billion in research grants later today.

The money is aimed at supporting research into why his other stimulus packages have failed.

 


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Neil Berliner
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$ troubles for the NFL!

By: Neil Berliner (C)
Submitted: Sep 2, 2009
Category: Sports  
From Hot Topic

New York Jets

16 Jokes  1 Videos

The recession has hit the NFL, causing many teams to offer innovative promotions to attract fans. The New York Jets, for instance, are offering “half-season ticket” plans. Choose between the September/October “1969 Again!” package, or the dirt cheap November/December, “4 Months ‘Til Fucking Baseball Season!” plan.


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Chad Reiling
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Works for me!

By: Chad Reiling (C)
Submitted: Aug 27, 2009
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

Amy Winehouse

72 Jokes

Works for me!

New rules under the Family Smoking Prevention and Tobacco Control Act will require tobacco companies to cover at least half of the front and back of packages with graphic—and possibly gruesome—images illustrating the dangers of smoking.

Yowza!  That oughtta do it!



 


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Lilly
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Internet Stimulus Package

By: Lilly  (M)
Submitted: Aug 11, 2009
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

Bailout

317 Jokes  4 Videos

The Commerce Department's National Telecommunications Information Administration and the Agriculture Department's Rural Utility Service are spearheading a $7.2 billion stimulus initiative to expand broadband access to rural America like Ashville, North Carolina.    

In a related story, West Virginia is petitioning the government for funding to broadcast color television and for push button telephone service.


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