During an appearance on “Larry King Live”, singer/awful actress Mariah Carey revealed that she was “emotionally abused” in a past relationship.

That’s funny… I said the same thing after seeing “Glitter”. 

Mariah Carey told Larry King that she drank what she called "ugly juice" to prepare for her role  in the film "Precious".  When the talk show host asked her what it tastes like, Mariah looked at him and replied, "Oh please, Larry, you were obviously raised on the stuff!"

On The Larry King Show, Mariah Carey told him that she drank what she called "ugly juice" to prepare for her role in the film "Precious".  To survive her acting, audience members will hopefully be given free "amnesia juice" when they leave the theater!  

A meaner, tougher, and much more dominant Ann Robinson will be getting her old show back next season .  Scatter-brained, self indulgent,  lady celebrity contestants will be competing in this updated version of " The Weakest Link  " . The opening show will include : Jessica Simpson , La Toya Jackson , Britney Spears , Lindsay Lohan , Mariah Carey , Sarah Palin , Vanna White , Paris Hilton , Beyonce Knowles , and Kendra Wilkinson .  Originally the show was to run for only 30 minutes but Robinson was able to convince the producer she needed at least one hour .   " These 10 Frivolous and Vacuous Tarts are incredibly stupid .  I am going to have to repeat each question at least a half dozen times and kick a few butts before i get any responce . "  Robinson said ................  Tom Cruise and Joe Biden will headline the all male sequel .......................................................................................(kascha-whitney) 

Pop diva Mariah Carey is suing porn DDiva Mary Carey citing the likelihood that consumers will "mistakenly associate the goods offered" by Mary Carey--whose real name is Mary Cook--with the performer's "goods and services."

Mariah Carey is suing a politically active porn star for using a similar name. The singer is afraid her fans might mistake her for a registered voter.

At the suggestion of my family, I'm going to try to do a clean joke that everyone can enjoy.

What's black and white and red all over?

Mariah Carey being stabbed to death!

Dammit that always happens! Every time I try do a family-friendly joke, I end up killing a worthless celebrity in the punchline. Watch:

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Paris Hilton just.

Paris Hilton just who?

Paris Hilton just swallowed a shotgun!

Mariah Carey constantly has dreams where she shows up to work with all her clothes on.