G O L F once stood for Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden.

Now it stands for Go Out Leave Family. 

Tiger picked up two new sponsors. He took them for the money, even though he doesn't use the products...Trojan Condoms and Viagra.

I Twittered my Google and came on MyFace!

 "I'm So Confused"

I heard we dropped the bomb...so IRAN home to my FOX and I saw it on the TV.

We gave them the A bomb and then the H bomb.

The people in Iran said AH!!!!! The rest of US said HA!!!!!

The more we give them AAAAHHHH!!!!! The more people say HAHAHA!!!!!

June 2009 was the second wettest June in history. I just want to say thank you to all the ladies who participated.

Michael Jackson is Thrilled to see Vincent Price again! 

Michael Jackson will be touring will Elvis Presley, mostly in Las Vegas. 

Michael Vick has been rehabilitated and has a new job. His new mission is to become a Pokemon Ranger, capture Pokemon and force them to do battle against their will versus other Pokemon. If his Pokemon lose, they'll be cooped up in a little Pokeball forever!

Unemployment applications are slowing down. That's because just about everyone is already unemployed. 

Marajuna gets closer to medical use...

Study shows 50% of the people using became hyper then lazy, 50% became lazy then sleepy, and 50% were able to concentrate on watching TV and playing video games.