Jersey Shore" dimwitted diva Snookie, again embarassing her teachers in Marlboro, NY by declaring New Jersey fighting for the "South" during the Civil War. Seems she was thrown off by the word "Civil".

He’s likely to face tough questions: How to create jobs? How to pass healthcare legislation? What, pray tell, was Lady Gaga wearing to the Grammy’s?

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Newly elected Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown says nudity is what got him to where he is now..In politics, the reverse usually happens.

Tiger Woods is working on a deal with the Shady Lady Ranch in Nevada.

The woman can come to him and he'll pay THEM.

Such a Deal!  You got it, you give it away, you still go it.

"After a breakup, a friend of mine Swarovski-crystalled my precious lady," Jennifer Love Hewitt told George Lopez on his talk show. "It shined like a disco ball so I have a whole chapter [in her book] in there on how women should vagazzle their vajayjays."

 This may date me but I can remember when women had their vajayjays vajizzled.

 President Obama has a new nephew. The First Lady's brother, Oregon State basketball coach Craig Robinson, and his wife Kelly announced the birth of their son, Austin. Fox news has dispatched reporters to Kenya to search for the child's real birth certificate.

I can't wait to see Tim Tebow play for a pro team. Especially when he fades back for a pass while walking on water, pausing to heal a leper, making wine from water, saving a small Philippino boy from the tragedy of being uncircumcised and doing it all while quoting scripture...in tongues!

Yes, the New Orleans "Saints" will be blessed by having him there.

Congratulations to Gloria "Bunny" Mendenschein, age 85, of Ft. Lauderdale, Florida...she was just selected as "Miss Golden Age of Broward County".

Her winning attributes? A bust that is a 38-long and the ability to wear a thong in either direction...and have it fit the same. 

The President and First Lady really enjoyed their stay in Hawaii . Michele Obama said to Barack one evening on a moon lit beach, " Oh Barack, I think I can just reach up and touch the stars. "  Obama replied " With those long arms honey, I think you can " ...... " Oh Barack, I love this place so much, I wish someday we can retire here ."  Obama replied , " Guess what ? in only three years we can ! "