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.jpg) 7:00 AM Cabinet assembles; bagels, lox, and cream cheese from Manny's Kosher. Read daily Presidential Briefing, then go around room and introduce yourself.
8:00 AM Sort out World Affairs. Assign priorities and Cabinet members responsible. Give due dates. Describe unflinching groundings, if deadlines missed.
10:00 AM Pick-up game of basketball with Rahm Emanuel. Handicap him for being a shrimp at 5'4"
11:00 AM Read/sort e-mail--- save hard copies of congratulatory letters.
12:00-1:00 PM Lunch at Hooters; go with Biden, and Hillary.
1:00-5:00 PM Interview White House Interns (Michelle must approve all).
Rest of day is dinner with Michelle and planning national/global strategies for tomorrow's Cabinet meeting. Gloat!
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Q - You turn on Fox News and find a lot of stuff that looks very, very wrong. You think it's a hallucination from living a crazy life as a young adult. George W. Bush is sitting amid a couple cases of old, but cold Billy Beer - now just empty trophies of another bout of drinking alone; a Fox News investigative team is trying to question the dead corpse of a very weird looking albino bigfoot creature lying on the White House lawn; Laura Bush is sneaking a Virginia Slims full flavor near a back door, standing and talking with some housekeepers; Dick Cheney is in the oval office overseeing an obscure sculptor creating the bust of Nicolò Machiavelli; John Edwards is conducting interviews with a line of Hooters Girls for the liberal left's latest "Rock-U-Mentory," El Groucho Moutho Bill Clinton is screaming at an elderly group sightseeing in the White House lobby; and Al Gore is conducting a weird autopsy on an amoeba, staring through an electron microscope holding a very small scalpel and a tiny set of cuticle scissors.
- What in the hell is the matter with this picture?
A. - Nothing - the overall scenario is perfectly normal for the times we're in.
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China won gold medals in men and women's shooting. Glad to hear the Chinese government is equally adept at shooting people from both genders.
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