This past Election Day, as usual, I didn’t vote. Voting isn’t a system that works.  The majority of people are idiots, and in voting, the majority of people are right.  Politicians learn early on that they have to lie, make false promises, and hide their real agendas to get the majority of voters, who don’t know what they are talking about, to vote them into office.  I don’t really blame them, as that is the position they are put in to succeed.  It just makes it impossible to tell who’s corrupt, and who’s trying to help.  They all have to lie to some extent.  If the good one’s don’t lie, they’ll lose to the bad one’s who do because people are voting based on campaign promises that sound good.  If a politician stood there and was realistic with everyone about what they think could be done, he wouldn’t sound very exciting. When have we had a candidate that came anywhere close to delivering what they promised in their campaign?  Has that ever happened? Take Obama for example, the whole time he was campaigning, he didn’t even know the details of the job he was applying for.  They don’t give you the top secret briefing till after you are elected.

“Oh, remember all those things you promised in your campaign…. Well, there are a few things we should probably fill you in on.  Number 1, we’re dead broke.  Our credit score is horrible, and we’re not even getting low interest balance transfer offers from France anymore.  Oh, and we haven’t been getting a lot done lately cause everyone’s out sick with some weird flu”

If a corporation was run by a president that was elected by all it’s employee’s, that corporation would go out of business. Employees don’t know company secrets or what it takes to make the real money.  The majority of people walking into a voting both simply don’t know what they are talking about.  I myself am no political genius and by my own guidelines am not qualified to vote.  Voting is a nice fairytale, and at the same time, I don’t have a better solution to offer.  I do think and hope that we have enough checks and balances to keep us out of any real disasters, but I’m starting to have my doubts.

  I met a woman who lives in Hurricane, West Virginia. Nothing like naming your town after recurring natural disasters. Makes you wonder if there's a Flash Flood, Missouri or Schwarzenegger, California.

Jerry Bruckheimer is interested in buying the Sacramento Kings. Luckily his experience directing Pearl Harbor has prepared him well for epic disasters.

I am pro-choice and pro-choice for one reason alone. Look at the trailor park. Some genetic disasters need to be stopped.

The American Public was overheard in a nail salon yesterday complaining about its Congress to a friend. Apparently, the Public was “totally fed up” with all of it.

“I’m soooo over this Congress,” said the Public. “Usually, after having the same Congress for a while, I can pick one or two Senators that I can tolerate being seen outside with. But this time I’m like “yecchh!”— the whole thing has got to go. I swear, sometimes I feel like pouring gasoline all over this Congress and tossing a match on it.”

“There’s nothing about this Congress I like anymore. I look at all these disasters and think ‘How the hell could I have voted for THAT?’ You'd think I'd have learned my lesson after my whole 1994 fiasco, but no! This is what I get for listening to all the so-called “experts.” They make you so afraid of being labeled “out of touch,”, “deluded” or “sympathizing with terrorists,” but sure enough, the whole thing becomes embarrassing in no time flat. Soon, the whole world has moved on, and there I am, stuck with a whole Congress full of losers, looking like a horse’s ass to boot.”

The Public then vowed to “clean house” in November, and get a whole new Congress. And all new shoes too.