I found a book called "Power of Focus" in my closet today, while looking for something. For arguement sakes, lets call the item I was looking for... porn! So anyways, I have had "The Power of Focus" for several years now and haven't even read the entire first chapter! We are only talking 13 pages here people!! Perhaps the author didn't understand that people that would be reading the book "might" have a problem "focusing"!! So needless to say, NO props to this book or the book's authors for keeping my attention!! However, I did go to the bookstore today to get a book on "motivation"!! WooHoo, I actually managed to pick up a book and start walking toward the register to check out. After skimming through the book, It just wasn't motivating me at all! I have a funny feeling the author was related to "The Power of Focus"! Thank God I wasn't looking for a book on "Depression"!! I probably would have hung myself between the origami isle and Starbuck's stand!! However, if  my day job as a male dancer doesn't pan out I know I can be an author on pretty much anything, because the qualifications to write a book don't seem to be that stringent!!

Tiger Woods was reported to have sexual encounters with other men. I guess it wasn't just his green jackets that were in the closet...

 Andy admitted how difficult it was for him to discard any broken or obsolete items he accumulated over the years . " I love my old junk even if it's outdated or doesn't work any more . I just can't bear to part with anything I have aquired during my lifetime  . On my day off from work I like go out dumpster diving along the East Side of Manhattan . You never know what good stuff you're going to find there . Last week I brought home a 1960's era Black & White TV with built in phonograph player , a rotory telephone , and a baby carriage with only 3 wheels . Why in the world would anybody be crazy enough to throw away such good stuff ?  My boss can't wait for the day I retire . My office is loaded with junk I collected since I was first hired by CBS . With all the clutter in my home it's hard for me to find a place to sit down . Moving about from room to room is not for the faint of heart . I was thinking of adding an extension to my house just for a place to keep my bed . I'm so tired of having to sleep in the car every night ..... All I can say is, When I die please bury me at the City Dump along with all of my wonderful, worthless treasures in a very big hole  "     ....................................................................................................... Disclaimer , not the actual words of Mr Rooney but probably pretty close     

A forth comming book will claim that Tiger Woods had gay encounters.....I guess that changes him from a tiger to a pussycat! 

Check out this quote:

"Years ago, somebody told me that when Tiger was a kid, he taped a list of my golf accomplishments on his closet. Well, if he's making a checkmark every time he matches me in something, he must have his pencil out pretty darn often."

- Jack Nicklaus

Apparently he does have his pencil out quite a bit, Jack!!

Ben and Jerry's announced they have changed the name of their new ice cream from Chubby Hubby to Hubby Hubby to support gay marriage.

 Critics say not only does it taste like shit, but theres too many nuts in it.

 They are also offering a hetero container so republicans can eat it in the closet.

Police in Bennington, Vt., say a man spent almost six years sexually abusing a boy whom he hit, threatened and locked in a bedroom while denying him food and water. The man is known as the 'King of Vermont.'

With great anticipation i tuned into the latest installment of  " Larry King Live " at Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch . Miko Brando , sporting his ugliest Hawaii print shirt to date, took us on a tour of the now empty main house . We saw many wooden floors, plaster walls, and a banister with a tree carved in it !  He also pointed out a stairway leading up to bedroom where Michael would commit unspeakable acts against young teenage boys . In the bathroom was a secret closet with many locks on it . Miko said it was Jackson's panic room, " Just in case . " ( of a police raid ? )  From there Brando took us to see the Station House that was also stripped to the bone . The highlight of that tour was a large soot stain on a brick overpass the choo-choo train had made . Miko also showed us the dance floor where Michael practiced . He pointed to the center of the wooden floor that looked worn out . (  maybe the cleaning lady just happened to miss a spot with her mop ? )..... Back in the garden, Fish-Faced Larry interviewed Jermaine in what appeared to be extreamly  uncomfortable for the grieving Jackson brother . Jermaine denied any rumors about Michael's strange and kinky behavior . Sweating profusely, tugging at his ear, pinching his nose , and swatting flies and mosquitoes,  Jermaine begged Larry to stop asking so many difficult questions .  " Jermaine, what do you think of Diana Sands being mentioned as the legal guardian in Michael's will ? " A confused Jackson looked dumbfounded ..............  Jermaine also showed Larry a tree that Michael had once climbed and supposedly wrote songs on . King sacastically told Jackson , " Don't Kill Yourself  now ."  Another comment King made earlier to Jermaine was, " You call it Neverland and I call it never, never, never land "  i wonder what he meant by that ?...................................................................... to be continued ...............................................................(kascha & whitney)    

Carbon dating tests on bones found inside a sarcophagus unearthed in Rome indicate they may be the remains of Paul the Apostle. It's official, the Catholic Church has yet one more skeleton in their closet. 

www.jerrywolski.com

In a recent sermon, Pastor Manning denounced Barack Obama as being a devil, coming from a white trash mama and being a closeted homosexual. Pastor Manning then went on to challenge Obama to a Hardcore Match at Summerslam.