Not long ago, Joe Biden told this guy in a wheelchair to stand up and take a bow.

   Understandably, Biden withstood a torrent of jeers and criticism for the obvious gaff.

   Some rock-ribbed Republicans went so far as to characterize Mr. Biden's behavior as "sheer cruelty."

   A few diehard Democrats posited that the Vice President--being a believing Christian--may simply have been trying to heal the man.

   Both these groups were kidding--I think.

Fort Collins, Colorado's Holiday Display Task Force recommended putting up only white lights because red and green lights might be seen an endorsement of the Christian religion.  ***MARLAR: Because we all remember the story of how Jesus miraculously changed the colors of light bulbs for his birthday. 

Is Bob Dylan Christian or Jewish these days? It's so hard to keep track. There should be a web site for that like "Is Twitter Down?" Yeah, there's an app for that.

For some reason, they all have large breasts. Apparently, not only was Jesus able to turn water into wine, he was also able to turn B-cups into D-cups

Years ago, I saw this bumper sticker that read "Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven".

 Why is there only a Christian themed bumper sticker? Why not recognize other denominations?

"Jews aren't perfect, that's why they're in therapy."

or "Islamic Fundamentalists aren't perfect, and that's just the women."?

The guitarist from Christian Metal band Stryper has recently wed a former prostitute now turned evangelical.

She runs a Christian outreach called Hookers for Jesus.

Ive done my research and they do offer a 12 for 1 Apostle rate.

 No matter how much you pay, you can only cum once.

 They talk about a second coming...

 but we all know thats never going to happen.

I'm sorry Sara that I made an inappropriate joke about your daughter last week,to raise my ratings against Conan.

Oh Dave, being a fine christian woman,I forgive you,for giving me this big political bump.Im sure to be the frontrunner now.

What would happen if  "Dark Knight" Christian Bale were walking around with a booger up his nose and his publicist told him "You have a bat in the cave"... Would he have any idea of what the hell they were talking about?

Miss California is through in pageants. Now that she's pissed off the gays, who's going to style her hair? Who's going to design her dresses? Who's going to WATCH HER BEAUTY PAGEANT? Normal heterosexual Christian men won't watch--they're too busy looking at the semi-nude picture of her at 17.

What's the difference between a patio and Christian Bale? A patio is often called a deck..Christian Bale is often called a dick..