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Steven Longden
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He bringing BadActingBack

By: Steven Longden (C)
Submitted: Jul 28, 2010
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Justin Timberlake

21 Jokes

Justin Timberlake has been cast in the lead role in the science-fiction film I'm.mortal, about a poor man who is falsely accused of murdering a wealthy man.  I'm.mortal also depicts a future where the aging gene is turned off at age 25.  Justin Timberlake?  Aging gene?  I'm.notpaying$10.75toseeit


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Hunter Downs
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Hot Under The Collar

By: Hunter Downs (M)
Submitted: Jul 28, 2010
Category: Entertainment  

In a bold experiment,I outsourced my laundry to Bangladesh.

Unfortunately,it came back with Dhaka all over it.


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smackdab inthemiddle
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Why Is BP's Tony Hayward Rushin' To Russia?

By: smackdab inthemiddle (M)
Submitted: Jul 28, 2010
Category: News  
From Hot Topic

BP

253 Jokes  1 Videos

Tony Hayward is stepping down as CEO of BP

He claims he wants to get his life back by going to Siberia

Is he totally naive or what?

 

By the way FOX news reports Tony Hayward has just bought the Brooklyn Bridge

 


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nileor
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100 bottle-Nosed Dolphins surrounded a BP oil rig

By: nileor  (M)
Submitted: Jul 23, 2010
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

BP

253 Jokes  1 Videos

100 Bottle-Nosed Dolphins surrounded a BP oil rig and started swimming "counter clockwise" until they got the platform to turn and break the pipe. Later they were all found wallowing in the oil slick gasping. All were gathered carefully and taken to the nearest dolphin rescue compound. Every Dolphin was cleaned and fed fish until they were full, as predicted they were found healthy and then released back to the sea and all humans rejoiced. Once they were 2 miles out of sight the Pod Leader has them circle into a group "OK see everyone, I told you it would work ! Now lets head on over to Florida where they serve Margaritas with the Herring and rub banana oil all over you "

 


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nileor
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two polar bears floating on piece of decking from BP rig

By: nileor  (M)
Submitted: Jul 23, 2010
Category: Political  
From Hot Topic

BP

253 Jokes  1 Videos

Two polar bears are floating on a piece of decking from the BP oil rig too far out to swim back to safety. A pod of Killer Whales have been harassing them for the last 3 days, bobbing up and down and sticking their tongues at them while winking. One Polar Bear looks at the other Polar Bear and says " I sure hope this BP oil rig blowing up doesn't cause the price of gas to go up again or we will never get rescued from these Whaleholes"


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bix brillo
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Brokeback Mountain 2

By: bix brillo (C)
Submitted: Jul 23, 2010
Category: Entertainment  

Casting for "Brokeback Mountain 2" is nearly complete.  Producers have cast all roles with the exception of lead characters  "John Fitzpatrick" and "Patrick Fitzjohn." 


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Eddie
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The Overseer

By: Eddie  (C)
Submitted: Jul 22, 2010
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Virginia

114 Jokes  28 Videos

Okay a black man named Tyrone,.. from today's time; goes into a time machine & goes back into time,..lets call it 1859,.. & he finds himself in a cotton field in Virginia. He is unable to return to present day, & is forced to adjust.

Just then this big mean looking white guy that the field workers called the 'overseer" walks up to him & says, "Boy, that cotton aint gonna pick it self."

Tyrone looked him right in the eye & replied, " I aint picking no motherfucking cotton ..mother fucker."

So the overseer takes a step back & says, "Okay then, go pick that corn, & get it into the crib."

Tyrone flipped him the finger & says, "Motherfucker, go pick your own corn. You aint looking at no field hand motherfucker. I'll fuck you up."

So the overseer brings this fine looking young 'redbone' kitchen worker with this 'down for whatever' look on her face.. to him & says, "Sounds like mothers &  fucking is your thing boy, so make me some pick-a-ninnies..

Tyrone is about to chew him out for the insult, but takes a look at the girl, starts shuffling his feet, looking down at the ground & says, " Yass sir massa, I'll do it right away!"

The overseer smirked and said, "& That's why they call me the Overseer!"


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Howard
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NC MAN CHARGED WITH TOILET PAPER ASSAULT

By: Howard  (M)
Submitted: Jul 22, 2010
Category: News  Staff Pick!
From Hot Topic

North Carolina

158 Jokes  3 Videos

A North Carolina woman was taken to the hospital after her husband loaded a gun with toilet paper and shot her in the back. Great Scott! What a crappy thing to do.


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Kev Heritage
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Muppet Britney

By: Kev Heritage (C)
Submitted: Jul 22, 2010
Category: Entertainment  
From Hot Topic

Britney Spears

198 Jokes  8 Videos

Britney Spears was recently seen out shopping with 'hair like a muppet' - maybe she should shave it off? That would certainly get the media off her back...

twitter: kevs_world


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tHejOkEsTeR Gordon
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Zooology 101

By: tHejOkEsTeR Gordon (C)
Submitted: Jul 21, 2010
Category: Weird  
From Hot Topic

Dog

644 Jokes  24 Videos

A salesman is visiting a town for the first time.

On the way to the hotel he asks the cab driver what there is to do in the town.

The cab-driver thinks a bit before replying, “You could always go to the zoo!”

The man thanks him, checks into his hotel, then goes to look for the zoo. Fortunately it’s well signed and a few minutes later he walks up to the entrance and asks for a ticket.

“That’ll be $20.” says the zoo-keeper.

“Twenty?!” gasps the man, “Is the zoo that good, then?”

“Best zoo in town, sir.” the Keeper answers.

So the man pays his money and goes inside. The first cage he comes to is completely empty. Well the man is a little peeved, but he just puts it down to the animal being cleaned or something and moves on. Only the second cage is empty too, and the third, and the forth. Soon the man is running past row after row of empty cages, getting more and more frustrated, until he comes to the last cage. Inside is a single, small dog, yapping shrilly.

By now the man has had enough, he storms back to the entrance, bangs on the glass and shouts at the zoo-keeper :

“I paid $20 to see some goddamn animals and there’s nothing in here but one damn lap-dog! What’s the meaning of this?!”

The keeper looks up from his paper and replies:

“It’s a Shiht-Tsu.”

*DA-DUM!* *KSSH!”

 

 


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