An animal rights group wants organizers of Pennsylvania's Groundhog Day festival to replace Punxsutawney Phil with a robotic stand-in.  People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals says it's unfair to keep the animal in captivity and subject him to the huge crowds and bright lights that accompany tens of thousands of revelers each Feb. 2 in Punxsutawney, a tiny borough about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.  ***MARLAR: The rest of us think it’s unfair to keep us captive to PETA’s freakish opinions.

Steve Irwin, The Croc Hunter, died a tragic death several year's ago.  Now his daughter, Bindy has her own talking doll.  It says upbeat phrases like: "Let's save planet Earth!" and "All animals are our friends!"

I think it ought to say: "Dad, watch out!  It's a giant stingray!"

In recent news, investigators dug up more than 18 dead animals in the backyard of the Selden home of Sharon McDonough.  She is charged with multiple counts of animal cruelty and lost temporary custody of several of her children.  In McDonough's defense, she told the press she was simply planning for her son's next birthday party, an educational archeological dig in her family's backyard!

Badge? Check! Gun? Check! Pooper Scooper?  Maybe not. Officials in Madison, Wisconsin, are considering a proposal that would exempt police from the local pooper scooper law.  For now, officers who are part of mounted patrols or K-9 units have to pick up after the animals, just like every other pet owner.  The measure to be considered by the city council would drop the droppings requirement for officers while on duty. One alderwoman notes that picking up the droppings can be difficult for the mounted officers who do crowd control at the University of Wisconsin football games.  ***MARLAR: Actually, if you left the doo on the ground, wouldn’t the crowd size be a lot more manageable?

Don't stare at the chimps! That's the new rule posted at the zoo in Antwerp, Belgium. Of course, you can't feed them, either. Zoo officials are particularly concerned about a male chimp named Cheetah. They worry that people staring at Cheetah will prevent him from bonding with the other apes at the park. He was raised by humans, but the zoo keepers say Cheetah is now making contact with others of his kind. ***MARLAR: So, in other words, go ahead and pay the big bucks to get into the zoo – but whatever you do, DON’T LOOK AT THE ANIMALS!

Looks like the stuffed animals and hand puppet industry may be the latest casualty of H1N1. In Minneapolis, Hennepin County libraries say plush toys and hand puppets will no longer be available for checkout or play, partly because of H1N1 flu concerns. Puppets have been available at less than half of the 41 libraries in the suburbs and in Minneapolis and some are allowed to be checked out. And while there's no way to know if anyone has gotten ill through the puppets, the libraries are sensitive to the real threat and public sense that puppets might be germy. So for now the kids will only have toys that can easily wiped down.  ***MARLAR: Miss Piggy is insistent it has nothing to do with her.

Rodell Vereen was sentenced on Wednesday, November 4, to three years in prison after being caught, on video, having sex with a horse.  He admitted to buggery and pleaded guilty, for the second time in two years, to abusing the animal.

In a related story, on Tuesday, November 10, British scientists announced the beginning of a new study on using human DNA in animals!

Is the timing of these two news events is just a coincedence, or do the Brits have a study participant in mind?

It was pretty creepy and crawly – even for New York’s Bravest.  Firefighters in the New York City borough of Queens found snakes and creepy critters galore when they responded to a small basement fire.  Lieutenant Ed Ireland says it was like something out of a science fiction movie.  After the smoke cleared, Ireland says he saw a ten-foot python slithering near his feet.  There were also two cobras, tarantulas, two small alligators, and other creatures.  The animals’ owner was cited for health code violations.  ***MARLAR: Samuel Jackson has already signed on for the movie.