There are matchmakers and then there are match breakers, such as the Huron County judge who sent a woman to jail for polygamy and gave her six months to divorce one of her husbands. Lorri L. Freesland of Kinde pleaded guilty to the charge in December.  Circuit Judge M. Richard Knoblock on Monday sentenced the 43-year-old Freesland to 15 days in jail and one year of probation. He also told her she had six months to resolve her marital status.  ***MARLAR: At which point she’ll likely still get half one husband’s stuff and still have access to all of the other husband’s stuff.  She breaks the law and still gets all-and-a-half from her husbands!

Amy Winehouse pleaded guilty to assaulting a theater manager at a family Christmas show and was ordered to pay her victim $300 – or, in Winehouse-speak – two 8-balls.

... all her incessant, ridiculous contract demands have earned Mariah Carey the title of world's most difficult entertainer to work with.  After 4 consecutive titles, Carey has lost out this year to Amy Winehouse.  A representative for Carey has told the Hollywood Insider that she is "diva-stated."

 The man told authorities he was catering a dinner party at the home of Amy Winehouse. 

 To more accurately reflect her drug use, Amy is changing her name from Winehouse to Crackhouse.

Pamela Anderson’s manager recently demanded that photographers shoot her only with a "ring flash," which eliminates imperfections.  If only he’d manage Amy Winehouse or Carrot Top.  

...Amy Winehouse spent roughly $14 million on partying while on a 7 month stay in St. Lucia.  Most of the money went to pay for drugs & alcohol, new clothes, and her next 3 re-hab stays.  

A high school in Michigan reported that one out of every 10 students who participated in STD test was found to have chlamydia....the only known place in the US where there is actually a higher risk of contracting Chlamydia is among staff members of The David Letterman Show.

Is Coca-Cola an effective form of birth control? Does rectal message cure hiccups?

Scientists who have devoted their research (and sadly, their lives) to these burning questions are converging on Harvard University for the 2009 Ig Nobel Prizes, an annual tongue-in-cheek tribute to studies that “cannot or should not be reproduced”.

Past winners of the illustrious award, include:

--Dr. Francis Fesmire, for a paper he wrote called “Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage”.

--Ellen Kleist and Harold Moi, for the cautionary medical report “Transmission of Gonorrhea Through an Inflatable Doll”.

--Three doctors at a Navy hospital in San Diego, for research into “Acute Management of the Zipper-Entrapped Penis”.

By all accounts, the 2009 Ig Nobels are shaping up to be a fierce competition, with numerous projects worthy of taking home the top prize.

Among the favorites to win:

--Jon Gosselin, for a paper he wrote called “Marrying a Bitch Results in Birth of 8 Kids”. 

--Kanye West, for his research into “The Boundless Limits of the Celebrity Ego”.

--Thirty-seven doctors, for their study entitled “How in the Hell is Amy Winehouse Still Alive?” 

A suspicious white powder has been discovered hidden in a shipment of dictionaries.

“Nosey” workers spotted the unprincipled packets — which were headed for Madrid, Spain — at a post office in the Dominican Republic. Officials from the National Drug Control Agency intercepted them and found “a white powder that appears to be cocaine,” sewn into the lining of the books. Wasting no time, the NDCA called in Special Agent Keith Richards, who quickly confirmed the substance to indeed be booger sugar.

This is the third time in two months that drugs have been found sewn into book covers or cards bound for Spain from the Caribbean nation, prompting President Barack Obama to include the Dominican Republic on his list of 20 major drug producers. 

Not surprisingly, Amy Winehouse continues to hold the top spot on his list of 20 major drug consumers.