Ann Coulter has a new book out. It's called "Godless: the church of liberalism." Recent controversy around the book has propelled it to number one on the bestseller list. That's why I plan to title my next book, "Kittens for Breakfast, and other delicious recipes from the conservative kitchen."

By now, we've all heard that Full House star Jodie Sweetin is a recovering meth addict and an intervention was staged by her former Full House costars, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, John Stamos and Bob Saget.

Apparently just Dave Coolier telling her to “cut it out” wasn’t enough.

All I know is, if Bob Saget, John Stamos and the Olsen Twins all got together to ask me to stop doing something, I would stop it. I don’t care what it is.

Chocolate maker Nestle announced Monday that it will purchase weight loss product maker Jenny Craig Inc. for $600 million.

The large investment is an attempt to further Nestle’s health and wellness programs, as well as the latest chess move in a continuing effort by big business to ensure that Jenny Craig spokeswoman Kirstie Alley remains fat.

A boy goes up to his dad and asks the difference between "potentially" and "realistically." The father wants his son to learn, so, being the good dad he is, he gives his son an exercise.

"Go ask your mother, brother and sister the following question: Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"

He asks his mother and she replies, "Well I don't know. That is a lot of money so I guess I would. We could use the money to fix up the house and send you guys to a good college."

His sister says, "Sure. He's hot. I'd do it for free."

And his brother answers, "Well I guess I would. That's a lot of money."

He returns to his father and his father asks, "Well, what did you learn?" The boy says, "Potentially we are sitting on three million dollars. Realistically we are living with two sluts and a fag."

Ann Coulter visited her gynecologist, and after putting her in the stirrups, the doctor said, "My God, that is a big pussy. That is a big pussy."

Coulter said, "You don't have to say it twice."

The doctor said, "I didn't."

As I understand it, Adam Sandler's new movie "Click" is about a guy with a universal TV controller.

Remotely funny.

Adam Sandler turns 40 in a few months and the new father says he's ready to shift his focus. Sandler and his wife, Jackie, welcomed their first child, Sadie Madison, last month.

Sandler reports fatherhood is going well, but admits he is not sure if he will be able to answer all of the questions that inquisitive children will surely ask, such as "Why is the sky blue?", "Where do babies come from?", and "Why haven't you made a funny movie since Happy Gilmore?".

Malaysian students set a record for most people in a Mini Cooper when 21 students got into one and stayed the mandatory 20 seconds. What they didn't say is that Malaysia is a starving nation and there was still room for a family of four in the backseat. Also unreported: The government of Malaysia announced that it will set up its headquarters in the Mini Cooper.

The last of the "Star Wars" movies did what no movie in history had ever accomplished up until that point — sold $50 million worth of tickets in a single day.
However, this record will likely be broken soon when the price of a movie ticket goes up to $60 million dollars.